Books Books Books! Fall 2019 Edition

Ok, so I'm month late on this one.  Mah bad.  There is a reason though.  So you see, what had happened was, last semester was... rough.  And subsequently, that meant not keeping track of my reading and also not achieving my Goodreads challenge (and accepting it gracefully with a no fucks given attitude) and not even creating a draft for this post (fret not, the "Winter 2020" draft has already been created).  Truthfully, something had to give me for me to stay afloat and reading really took the hit.  I made straight A's though, so I guess #WorthIt?

Audiobook and Run.
It's totally a thing.

I'm linking up with Steph and Jana for the Show Us Your Books linkup, because I needed motivation to post this post after being a slackass.


Ultimate TLDR** 
Definitely Read:  

• All Along You Were Blooming: Thoughts for Boundless Living by Morgan Harper Nichols
• Ask Again, Yes by Mary Beth Keane

Maybe Read:  

• Crossing Tinker's Knob/And Then You Loved Me by Inglath Cooper
• The Institute by Stephen King
• The Giver of Stars by Jojo Moyes

Hard Pass:  

• True West by Sam Shepard

Rating scale*:

1/5 - Hated it, DNF (did not finish).
2/5 - Tolerated it on principle to finish, didn't like it.
3/5 - Eh, didn't love it, didn't hate it. Had some good parts/kept me interested/finished it on principle.
3.5/5 - I liked parts of it.
4/5 - I liked the whole thing.
4.5/5 - I liked it a lot, but not sure I'd read it again.
5/5 - I LURVED it and I'd read it again.

*Subject to change based on my mood, the phase of the moon, or other unpredictable variables.
PS. Possible spoilers included in reviews.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
October/November 2019:

Oathbringer (The Stormlight Archive #3) by Brandon Sanderson   3.75/5 (Audible, audiobook)

This is the book that killed my ability to complete my Goodreads challenge.  When I started listening to this "gem" I was 4 books ahead of schedule.  When I finished, I was one book behind, WITH completing this book.  FML.  Other comments I wrote included the fact that I wouldn't continue on if book 4 was over 40 hours long, it wasn't a commitment I could make.

My actual review:
The story was good.. but LAWDDDDD this book trudddddged on and on and on and on and on and on.. and I don't need to know that the spheres are dun if you tell me someone ran out of Stormlight. I GET IT.

I guess was "DUN" with that shit.

Girl, Stop Apologizing: A Shame-Free Plan for Embracing and Achieving Your Goals by Rachel Hollis   3/5 (Audible, audiobook)

I struggled with this book because there were things I couldn't really identify with (mom life, entrepreneur dreams, etc), but I was still able to take away some solid points. The bonus portion at the end of the audio book from a Rise event was a solid choice.  It actually made me tear up, but that might have been the affects of PMS.  I didn't love this one nearly as much as Girl, Wash Your Face, but I think GWYF came at exactly the right time, where this one didn't.  This mostly had to do with the fact that I had just finished Oathbringer and I wanted something that wasn't 55 hours long.  This fit the bill, even though I knew it wasn't the right time.  Oh well.

I think the biggest reason this book didn't resonate with me is because I am 110% ok with NOT being the boss.  I don't want to own my own business and I'm totally ok with the peon, be-told-what-to-do, life.  I like being able to go home at the end of the day and be DONE.  As a boss/manager, that's difficult to do.  Work/separation balance is extremely important to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
December 2019:

A Fire Sparkling by Julianne MacLean   3/5 (Kindle, ebook) 

A historical fiction story that involved sister twins, life during WW2, and a modern timeline too.  This book had me hooked pretty quickly and I didn't hate it, but parts of it felt unbelievable.  I also still have no idea how much time actually passed in the modern timeline.  I will say I didn't expect what happened to actually be what happened, but it was logical as you went on.  Also, the drama of the modern timeline was unnecessary and childish, IMO.

Crossing Tinker's Knob/And Then You Loved Me by Inglath Cooper   3.75/5 (Kindle, ebook) 

IDK why Goodreads has this listed with a different title than on the cover of the book, but whatever.  I enjoyed this book but felt that parts of it pushed believability, or maybe not.  I never decided.  Emma's decision was a relief to me because I was tired of that storyline.  The mom made me hate her quick.  Becca started to get on my nerves but I couldn't help but like her.  I finished this pretty quick, so I was hooked right away and couldn't put it down/had a lot of free time.

Dark Age (Red Rising Saga #5) by Pierce Brown   3/5 (Audible, audiobook)   

This book was extremely gory and 85% of the book was battles while the remaining 15% was character interactions between characters with Roman names.  It had been so long since I read the prior books that I had no idea what side anyone was on anymore.  It ultimately sorted itself out, but it was pretty distracting for a while.  Part of me wants to know what happens to Darrow and Virginia and Sevro and Victoria, but after having to slog through parts of this, I'm not sure I am committed enough to find out.

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January 2020:

You Can Thank Me Later: A Novella by Kelly Harms   3/5 (Audible, audiobook novella)  

A Thanksgiving novella from Audible, a freebie.  This was a meh for me.  Not bad, but not good.  Despite not being very long, it got repetitious quickly; family gathering for Thanksgiving, some in between life, family gathering for Thanksgiving (same drama), in-between life, family gathering for Thanksgiving.  /rolleyes.  Cute premise but it just wasn't my cup of tea.

I understand it's a novella and supposed to be short, but we spent a long time on repeating what had already happened and then it was like, OH YEAH, sorry we didn't pay you attention all these years because we were more focused on someone else... THE END.

True West by Sam Shepard   1-DNF/5 (Audible, free audiobook novella)  

This was so stupid that it was intolerable.

Ask Again, Yes by Mary Beth Keane   4.5/5 (Audible, audiobook) 

I was hooked by 15% and that's unusual for my hyper-critical self. I appreciated how this book ended, even if every single issue wasn't tied up perfectly. This story felt REAL which is probably why I enjoyed it so much.

The Institute by Stephen King   4.5/5 (Kindle, ebook, won from SUYB!)  

This book had me hooked by 10%, which is rare. Luke is a child prodigy with special skills. Tim is a not-cop in Podunk. Ultimately, their stories will come together. I appreciated the realistic rawness of the story-telling, even if sometimes vulgar and almost unbelievable (it's fiction, so duh). It has been many years since I read a Stephen King book and I can't remember why I stopped now.

The Giver of Stars by Jojo Moyes   4.25/5 (Audible, audiobook)  

I listened to this on audio and was not disappointed by the narrator's voices for the different characters and her KY accent. I was disappointed that Alice's inner voice wasn't with an English accent, but oh well.

Story wise, this story felt like historic fiction based on real life events, like these people could have actually lived. I was quickly drawn into the story, always a relief not to have to trod on and on waiting to get to the part that hooks you, and was genuinely curious how this would end, even though I had a solid (correct) hunch.

I did get a little tired of hearing how much sex everyone but Alice was having, but otherwise, very enjoyable.

All Along You Were Blooming: Thoughts for Boundless Living by Morgan Harper Nichols   5/5 (own, hard copy)  

MHN's new poetry book.  I preordered this the same day she sent the email that said she was releasing a book.  I had favorite "stories" but can't remember off the top of my head which ones they were.  Guess that means a re-read is in my future.

That said, I feel like this would have been better on the Kindle because then you can zoom in to read some of the tiny cursive and, depending on your device, you can screenshot and share.  Because it's not a standard book, it's a quick read.

There will be days when you do not feel
fearless
and you choose to get up
and go out anyway.

And my friend,
let me tell you,
that is what it means to be breave.
It is that gentle shove toward the water
that says "I will go,
and I will go afraid."

It is not a feeling.
It is not a thought.
It is that inward wind that pulls you out of sleep
and says "I will go forth,
with all I have now;
a breath, a dozen steps,
and a pocket full of fears,
but no matter what tries to pull me back,
I will find the strength to be here."
(Morgan Harper Nichols)

**TLDR: To long, didn't read.

Books Books Books! (Summer)

Summer reading dump is here!
If you don't want to read this entire post, that's fair.  

Ultimate TL;DR: (links on reviews)
Definitely Read:  

• Dear Madam President!!!  THIS THIS THIS!!!
• Girl, Wash Your Face!!  THIS THIS THIS!!!
• Burn for Me/White Hot/Wildfire (it's a series, if you can stop in the middle, you're stronger than me)

Maybe Read:  

• From Lukov With Love
• Us Against You (Beartown sequel)
• If you liked Beartown, this follow up I think does a good job of being a not-shitty sequel, but no more after this plskthx.
• Every Note Played
  

Hard Pass:  

• 1984
• Bad Girls Throughout History

Rating scale*:

1/5 - Hated it, DNF (didn't finish).
2/5 - Tolerated it on principle to finish, didn't like it.
3/5 - Eh, didn't love it, didn't hate it. Had some good parts/kept me interested/finished it on principle.
3.5/5 - I liked parts of it.
4/5 - I liked the whole thing.
4.5/5 - I liked it a lot, but not sure I'd read it again.
5/5 - I LURVED it and I'd read it again.

*Subject to change based on my mood, the phase of the moon, or other unpredictable variables.

Skimmers, stick with the bold text (TL;DR* parts).
PS. Possible spoilers included in reviews.

Burn for Me by Ilona Andrews   4.5/5 (library audiobook)

White Hot by Ilona Andrews   4.5/5 (library audiobook)

Wildfire by Ilona Andrews   4.5/5 (own, Audible audiobook)

This is all Kristen's fault.  She raved about these books and then I got hooked and had to read all three!  I started the first one after the spring semester ended and I had to pace myself not to race through all of them.  I ended up finishing the third book while we were on our honeymoon diving expedition.  Between dives, I could be found playing stupid games on my phone while listening to the audiobook.  Even Teh German took a little bit of an interest.

Nevada and Rogan are believable most of the time.  There are times that Nevada made me want to punch her in the face, but that's a thing with strong characters, sometimes they are unlikable (remind me that about Mere Barrow).  There were also times that Rogan made me want to punch him in the face, but considerably less than wanting to punch Nevada .

The series goes through adventures that Nevada gets involved in/with and how her family is affected by her decisions and abilities.

In bittersweet news (yay more of the series, boo series that never ends!), book 4 (or 3.5 per Goodreads) is supposedly coming in Nov 2018.

TL;DR: It's a romance story, but it's not sugary sweet and there were actually parts that made me LOL.  It's got super powers, if that's your jam, and it's believable as written.

Men Explain Things to Me by Rebecca Solnit   1.5/5 (library ebook) 

I thought this book was going to be about what the title suggested: mansplaining...  which was true, for the first chapter.. Then other topics were discussed.  At some point, I stumbled upon the fact that the book was actually a collection of essays, which made me hate it a little less.  But for me, the first essay was what I was looking for and after that, IDGAF about anything else in the book.

I probably should have, but I was disappointed by a misleading title.  Also, Solnit came across as an over-critical man-hater.  There was entire chapter on Virginia Wolfe and I was not interested so I skipped it.

TL;DR: I'm all about yay for feminism, but this book was not what I was looking for.  HARD PASS.

Bad Girls Throughout History: 100 Remarkable Women Who Changed the World by Ann Shen   1.5/5 (Amazon free ebook)

I almost DNF-ed this one, but it was early in the year and I was, stupidly, worried about meeting my Goodreads challenge for the year.  Instead, skimmed through this drivel.  If you want to know something about a bad ass woman, do the research yourself.  These articles felt like she'd summarized a Wikipedia article and had someone draw a "cute" artsy photo of the woman and then she managed to get it published.  Ugh.

TL;DR: PASS.  Even if it's free, even if it's to bump up your total books for the year, PASS.

Every Note Played by Lisa Genova   4/5 (library audiobook)

Genova tore me apart with Still Alice, like shredded my ice cold heart.  This book was not the same.  This book was depressing and sad, but the ALS character was so unlikable that I wasn't overly concerned that he was sick and was going to die.  Also, how do you not tell your kid that you're sick and going to die?  I just... no.

I did appreciate how the caretaker was portrayed as being the person making the sacrifices, rather than the sick person being treated as a hero.

TL;DR: Man with ALS is going to die.  Such is life.  This is the process of that monumental event.

Dear Madam President: An Open Letter to the Women Who Will Run the World by Jennifer Palmieri   10/5 (library audiobook)

This book, written by Hillary Clinton's communications director, is a letter to the, eventual, first female president.  I listened to this book on a flight during our honeymoon and I was blubbering and crying so hard and IDGAF.  Teh German even gave me a super concerned look when I was sniffling and wiping the tears away and then I told him what I was listening to and he was even more concerned/confused.

This book handled my heart with such gentleness, showing me all the struggles that powerful women have faced, continue face, and will always face.  It hit home in many ways, as I recognized scenarios that I have directly experienced because I am a female.  It also communicated hope.  That despite a serious blow to women in 2016, there is still hope.  Despite the blow, progress was made and progress will continue to be made.  There WILL BE a female president one day.

TL;DR: Struggles of powerful women have never been in shortage, nor will there be a time when powerful women don't struggle.  This book is the calm to a storm where you feel like you're barely able to stay afloat.

What Happened by Hillary Rodham Clinton   3.25/5 (library audiobook)

I wanted this to be the story of the election and the aftermath and the odds that were stacked against Clinton because she was a SHE..  But instead I felt like it was the story of the election and how emails email emails were the reason Hillary didn't win the presidential election in 2016 (holy shit, this fucktard has been our president for almost 2 years?  WTF is wrong with AMERICA?).

I wanted to hear about how she dealt with such a MAGNORMOUS defeat and the struggles in the days after.  There was a little of that, but it was kept to a minimum to take jabs at Trump and how he was elected with Putin's help and other political scandals that I really didn't care too much for.

TL;DR: If you're interested in Hillary's opinion of why she didn't win, this is the book for you.  Don't expect much of a summary about how being a female held her back.  If you want that, read Palmieri's book (above).

Grave Mercy by Robin LaFevers   3.5/5 (library ebook)

Dark Triumph by Robin LaFevers    3.5/5 (library ebook)

A series about "nuns" who are Death's handmaidens... essentially.  They kill people who are marked by Death, by marks only they can see.  This series was recommended by Brit.  This book is set in "olden times" if you will.  It's actually based on a historical event that I didn't read enough about to fully understand.  The books were enjoyable enough but I wasn't sooo hooked that I had to start the 3rd book right away, although it does sound the most intriguing.  I used the 2nd book as a challenge book.

TL;DR: People will die.  You'll wish other people died.  Also, the struggle in the 2nd book regarding responsibility and the true desires of Death was like a "FINALLY!" type of event.

From Lukov with Love by Mariana Zapata   4/5 (own, Audible audiobook)

Ice skating romance (or what apparently is called a "slow burn" which is something I didn't know was a thing until I wrote this review).  Jas is the fucking queen of the oblivious and she's too stubborn for her own good and if you didn't hate her at least once during the book, you're wrong.  She was obnoxious for so much of the book.

Lucky for her, we had Ivan, who I couldn't tell if he was a dick or a dream.  Honestly, for dealing with Jas, he's a fucking saint.  Lawdddd.  The banter was silly, but got old quickly because who actually acts like that all the time?  Let's get real people.

Nonetheless, it was a good book once you ignored how obnoxious Jas was and the epilogue was the perfect bow.

TL;DR: "Slow burn" where the main characters are ice skaters, which is kinda cool.

Us Against You by Fredrik Backman   5/5 (own, Audible audiobook)

BANG.
BANG.
BANG.
Something that irritated me very much when starting Beartown felt like a welcome home hug when I started Us Against You.

When I didn't get distracted by the Swedish story telling method, I luuuurrrvveeddd this book.  It's the way of foreshadowing then writing about what happens to show you how the scene actually unravels.

This book shattered my heart into so many pieces.  We revisit Maya as she works through the aftermath of her rape, Benji who deals with coming out, and all the support characters. Someone dies (no spoilers) and I didn't realize that it would crush me like it did. It was an excellent story of town rivalry and an accurate portrayal of the human character.

Also, if "that's a story for another time" is foreshadowing, I'm not sure if I'm excited or disappointed. At a certain point, it's ok to just let your characters go.

TL;DR: If you read Beartown, this is what immediately follows.  PS.  I still don't dig Swedish authors.

The Alice Network by Kate Quinn   3.5/5 (own, Audible audiobook)

Overall, I enjoyed this book. I felt like the beginning dragged a bit and I was over Eve's crochity-ness and Charlie's obsession with Rose. Also, I'm uncool enough to not know what a Lagonda is, so I had to Google that. That really helped me visualize more of the scenes.

The twist that tied them together in the end alllllmost felt a little far fetched for me, but it was still an interesting book.  By about halfway, I was relieved that we started to get into Eve's backstory because otherwise, this was going to be a DNF.  I was glad for the ending that tied everything up nicely.

TL;DR: WW1/post-WW2 fiction.  Female spies.  Coming of age. 

The Last Days of Night by Graham Moore   */5 (library audiobook)

I really enjoyed this book. It kinda lagged in the beginning, but after the initial setup, things progressed nicely. I'm sad that I can't say this wasn't fictional truth, as the end note essentially says, "Do not tell your friends the things in this book as hard facts." Nonetheless, I probably learned more about The Current Wars that I would have known otherwise.

It was very hard for me to stay in the 1886 time frame, I wanted the book to be set in the 1900-1905 time, for a reason that I do not know.  Also, I was glad for the happy ending after all the strife.

Now I want to read a book like this about Tesla inventing the electric car.

TL;DR: A historical fiction book about the AC/DC current battle between Edison and Westinghouse.

1984 by George Orwell   1.5/5 (library audiobook)

I know WHY we should all read 1984, but I fucking hated this book.  It was dry and tedious and if it hadn't been a challenge book, a book that most people read in high school, and a hot topic item due to the currently political scene in the US, I would have put this POS down by about page 25.  I HHHHAAAAATTTTTTEEEEEEDDDDDD this. 

Winston was a bore, Julia was interesting to me, but she didn't last. The affair was the most activity of the entire book and it was so short lived. Also, reading a book within the book made me stabby.

There are interesting points the book makes about complacency within the system and not fighting for your beliefs, but the entire book was so tedious that I felt like I was being tortured.  Like someone asked on Goodreads, WHY do people rate this 5 stars?  They obviously don't enjoy reading.

TL;DR: Find the Cliff's/Spark Notes (or whatever the current era's equivalent is) and read those and don't waste more of you life than necessary on this.

The Lords of Discipline by Pat Conroy  3/5 (own, Audible audiobook)

I struggle with authors who write the same book with different characters (lookin' at you, Nick Sparks).  I read South of Broad for last year's challenge and I felt like all the same characters were in this book, except they went to the Citadel (or the Institute, semantics).

I was disappointed that The 10 were never dealt with, the stuff with Anna Marie (or whatever her name was) seemed like a tool to pass the time and ended up being completely irrelevant, which frustrated me. As a current non-cadet student, it was no surprise to see the "not hazing" that occurs to knobs.  Obviously, the most heartbreaking thing is when Pig is shunned and I didn't see what happened after coming.

At times this book felt like a slog. Like sometimes Conroy just wanted to write big words about Charleston in endless run-on sentences, but when the action was going down, I was hooked.

TL;DR: The Citadel banned this book for a while because it casts them in a negative light, but those days are over.  I can't speak to the brutality of the plebe system, but there is obviously still a sufficient amount of difficulty to overcome your Knob year.  If you want a glimpse into the life of a military college, this does a good job.

Neil Patrick Harris: Choose Your Own Autobiography by Neil Patrick Harris, David Javerbaum   3.75/5 (own, hard copy)

As a NPH fan, this book was interesting to me when he explained about his childhood and getting into acting, etc. NPH seems like a generally awesome person who didn't let fame go to his head. The choose your own adventure part of this was cool in theory, but for this OCD reader, not knowing if I'd gotten through every page or not, I got frustrated. I did try the choose your own adventure thing, because it's cool in a, my 8 year old self would luuurrrvve this.. but my 32 year old self was like, I'm annoyed and lazy and will just be moving on to the next page now, kthx.

I would have liked more about HIMYM and maybe even the Dougie days, but there was more focus on magic, Broadway, being gay, and some other random stuff. Overall, I finished this book having enjoyed it though

TL;DR: If you're interested in the life of NPH, this book is for you.

War Storm (Red Queen #4) by Victoria Aveyard   3.5/5 (own, Audible audiobook)

WHHHYYYYYYY did this series not end?  We were SOOOO close and thennn Maven.. and now I have to wait on another book, which is the WORST.  For the 4th book, Cal and Mere have split up because Cal chose the crown and this book deals with that fallout.  Evangeline is a "slow burn" for me and as much as I dislike her, I also like her too, so it's complicated.  It didn't surprise me that she and Mere drifted towards each other more and more.

Maven.. That's So Maven.. is Maven.
Iris had me curious what was going to happen (since I'd mostly forgotten what happened in books 2/3 regarding her and her family) and I was glad in her Maven betrayal.

Mere was a lot less annoying in this book, but there were also 5 different perspectives so we didn't have to spend as much time with her. *praise hands*

TL;DR: I'm invested in this series and NOW I have to wait on another installment of the series and this is exactly why I hate series.  I hate waiting.

The Rising Tide (World War II: 1939-1945 #1) by Jeff Shaara   1/5 (returned, Audible audiobook)

Jeff Shaara writes as accurate as you can get historical fiction.  He does a lot of research on his characters (letters to/from them, journals, anything he can find) to make the characters as authentic as possible.  Yet, sometimes, that doesn't make a good story.  This book starts out in Africa during WW2 and not only was the desert dry, so was this book.  I endured about 4 hours before I finally said NO MAS!, informed Erin I was DNFing this book and would have to change 2 challenge category selections, AND went so far as to return this book to Audible because there will be NO wasted credits.

TL;DR: Did not finish because it was boring.  I never made it out of the desert.  Much like many soldiers.

Lily and the Octopus by Steven Rowley   3.5/5 (own, hard copy)

I'd heard a lot of good things about this book and as as dog person, I kinda knew where we were going to end up... what with dogs not having lifespans longer than humans.  I struggled with this book because the main ADULT character acted like a child in so many ways.

I did appreciate an accurate portrayal of weighing cost of pet care vs end results of said pet care.  I wasn't really into this book for a long time... and then I almost just gave up around 75% through because of octopus hunting and how fucking stupid it was.. and then it was just a dream, so if you read this and think, WTF this is stupid, just skip that chapter.  You're not missing anything.

Obviously when Ted had to take Lily in for her final vet visit, it shattered me.  We were actually driving back from NC and I went ahead and prepped myself with a tissue in hand because I knew I'd be crying.  Teh German was like, "WHAT IS HAPPENING???" and I explained that it was Lily's last vet visit and she wasn't coming home and he was like, "Ooooooohhhhhhhh."  With Phil, it was too soon, AND one of Lily's nicknames was Monkey and he kept referring to her as Monkey, which is one of Meri's nicknames and holy Lawd all my soft spots!

The final chapter/epilogue was sweet and really helped make up for the heartache of the final chapters, but not for the stupidity of the dream chapter and everything before.

TL;DR: It's no Art of Racing in the Rain, which will forever be the BEST book about dogs.

Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies about Who You Are So You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be by Rachel Hollis  10!/5 (library audiobook, own -hard copy)

I wasn't expecting to love this book.  I had read a trusted review and just didn't think this was going to be my jam.  In fact, WHILE I was listening, this was more like a 3.75/5.  There were chapters that didn't apply to me (mom related), there were things I don't really care about (setting these HUGE goals like owning a business, etc), but Rachel made such poignoit points on SOOO many #GirlPower things that this book just touched my soul.  Also, she encouraged people to do a Disney run, obviously we'd be friends.

I loved this book so much that I posted about it on FB.  I went and found jpgs of quotes since I only had listened to the audiobook and couldn't remember the exact quotes I wanted and I couldn't find them on the internet to recreate them myself.  I even went and bought a hard copy... and when it arrived I cracked open that book and underlined my favorite lines.  The lines that I want to stick with me FOR FOREVER.

I reached out to several women I know to tell them they should read this book.  Before I could figure out how to send the audiobook to Teh Running Bestie, she'd already purchased it.  As soon as I finished underlining my favorite things, I delivered my copy to Teh PT Wife.  I feel very strongly about this book.  I did NOT want to feel so strongly about a "self-help" book.  I just didn't.  BUT I DO.  Her situation isn't going to be everyone's situation and some of her stories need to be edited and she's realistic about the fact that most of the time, things don't work out like they worked out for her, butttttt she was REAL about those truths, which made me appreciate the stories and situations.

I will say that if you are not a super religious person, this might not be your jam.  But even though I've drifted away in the last few years, the religious parts of this book didn't take anything away for me.

TL;DR: YOU WERE NOT MADE TO BE SMALL.  If you don't read this book, just take away that SINGLE sentence.  Take it to your heart and let it blossom.  You were not made to be small.

In Progress:

• Magic Bites by Ilona Andrews  */5 (library, ebook)
• An Echo in the Bone by Diana Gabaldon   */5 (own, Audible audiobook)
  (Outlander #7, non-challenge book)
• The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield   */5 (library, audiobook)
  (final challenge book!)

On Deck:

Yes.



YAY for books!
*TL;DR = too long, don't read

It's OK #1

I'm switching gears on my Gentle Readers..

For years and years, I've done Confessions on Wednesday, but recently, I've found I don't really have as many things to confess.  And let's just be honest, mostly it was just a catch all post with me bitching about/telling you things that have happened in the last week.

More and more recently I've realized that I need to let myself off the hook for things I do.. or don't do.  I need to let things just be ok, so that's what these posts will be about... and maybe with some confessions.  #myblogmyrules

So this week... It is OK that:

...Sometimes I forget that I PayPal-ed money to myself and it just sits in a PayPal account.  This sucks because I'm not earning interest on my money... BUUUTTT it means that there's a very nice surprise waiting on me when I discover it.  This is applicable because I had Teh Sister order my new laptop so she could get the Best Buy reward points (since she has let us use her rewards several times) and I sent her the money through PayPal.  When I signed in to one of my accounts (I have 3 for the 3 different checking accounts I have, yes I'm ridiculous), there was $1000 just chillin' there.  It was like I had been saving that money for a new computer all along and I didn't even know about it.  So I bought my new computer and it didn't affect my account balances and I feel like a winner.

...that I let Sweet Tea on the couch.  It wasn't a fight I was willing to have and she already mostly hated me.

...that I also let Edie on the couch.  Even if it meant I had to spot clean the couch because her mouth was bleeding from treats I gave her...

...I bought 2 Kindles.  It means Teh PT Kid might get a new Kindle... and Teh German doesn't have to deliver a package to the UPS store.

...I haven't read a WW2 themed book in months.  I think.  It's nice to get out of "my" genre every now and then.  It also means I'm plowing through my challenge books.

...today is an "off" day.  We went to sleep late last night and I woke up late this morning.  I opted to wear a cute dress that I don't normally wear (hooray surgery diet).  As I was walking out the door, I dropped my full cup of tea and it spilled all over me and the floor and the runner.  Also since I was late, I had to deal with extra stupidos in morning traffic.  I'm afraid to even say out loud that it can't get worse, because it always can.

...that I was ready to give up on Parks and Rec.  We finally finished Modern Family and now we're back to watching Parks and Rec and after a miserable slog through seasons 1 and the first half of season 2, I'm finally catching myself LOLing ANNNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDDDD Rob Lowe has finally made his appearance and holy shit is he hot. 

...that it took 2 seconds of Rob Lowe being on the tv for me to admit to Teh German that Rob Lowe is my old man crush.  That said, do NOT read Rob Lowe's books.  They aren't that good.  #Illsaveyou

...that we've been thinking of Phil a lot this week.  Teh SC Greyhound Neighbor took Edie to the vet on Monday and Edie has now journeyed to the Bridge (aka her mom let her go/eased her pain/had her put to sleep).  My heart hurts for Teh SC Greyhound Neighbor because she was extremely close with Edie and because our own grief is still fairly fresh.  We cried for Edie and her Mom and Phil and then we hugged Pax and Meri extra tight.  As I told Teh German, we choose to love knowing we are entering into eventual heart break but that will never stop me from opening my heart to loving a pet. 

...that I didn't change my dress after I spilled tea all over myself this morning.  I just wiped myself down and cleaned up the mess and carried the fuck on. 

...that I wore Minnie leggings to work.  #Imanadultdammit

...that I ordered 3 sheets of Villains stamps.  #worthit

Weekend Review {7/17}

FRIDAY

After my Ortho appointment (where I learned that I could have been hip brace free 2 weeks ago), I went home and worked on my Friday post and did a little work.  I stalked the UPS site for when my laptop would be delivered and despite the 0945-1:45 estimate, it arrived after I left at 4:50... of course.

I headed to Moncks Corner with Teh PT Family to photograph their Mom's wedding.  After a simple ceremony, we took some photos on the train tracks and we set up for the reception.  The reception was a blast and we made it home around midnight.  Teh German and Teh Dental Hygienist came for the reception. 

Teh Dental Hygienist drove since she was test driving a new car.  This is only relevant because we were 90% of the way home when Teh German questioned if the vehicle's lights were on, which would cause the problem of there being no interior light.  Turns out, they were not.  Oops.  She's fully aware she'll never live it down.

We came home to bloody vomit on the rug downstairs.  Carpet cleaner use since Friday morning at 0515: 4.  It was at this point, I admitted defeat and agree with Teh German, no more dog sitting.

SATURDAY

The weekend goals were slim, which was nice.  I got up and fed the beasts, not wanting to deal with another session with the carpet cleaner.  I had intended on going back to bed, but the lure of a new computer was just too much for me.  I spent about 2 hours downloading programs and setting up the computer.  I put my new stickers on it.  I was pumped.  I uploaded the wedding photos and subscribed (ugh) to Lightroom and Photoshop (PS) to start working on photo editing.  I was going through the setting in Photoshop and noticed that PS was using the integrated graphics card instead of the Nvidia video card.  This is a problem because I specifically upgraded the video card in the computer for exactly this purpose.  After some troubleshooting, I couldn't fix the problem so I admitted defeat and decided to bring the laptop to Best Buy after my hair appointment.

Stickers!

I headed back to bed to take a nap.  I got up with Teh German around 10 and we had a slow start.  I tried to troubleshoot again with no success.  Teh German and I agreed that I would clean the toilets and he would clean the sinks so we could accomplish my lone weekend goal: to clean the bathrooms.

Around 1, I finally started getting ready for my appointment at 2.  We were super unmotivated.  I think I found a hair person in Charleston.  I'm sure several people will have outbursts of joy when they read that.  She was very nice and explained everything she was doing to my hair.  I explained that I was trying to grow it for the wedding.  I was pleased to see there was not a lot of hair on the floor after I got up.  I got several compliments on my blow out. 

I headed to Best Buy, trying to be optimistic.  Naive.  There was only 1 Geek at the Geek Squad desk since the other person was dispatched out on calls, strike 1.  The Geek at the desk seemed like he might be moderately proficient so I explained the problem and what I had done to troubleshoot the issue.  He suggested downloading the drivers directly from the Nvidia website, which we started the 7 minute download for.  And at 1 minute left, he needed the serial number and closed the laptop to get it...  Then when he came to check on the download a few minutes later I got to inform him that it had cancelled... when he had shut the laptopm strike 2.  He then said to me, "Oh, I thought it would download in the background."  Uhhhhhhhhh, what?  So we have to restart the download and at this point, I'm getting frustrated and he's already checking in my computer for drop-off, which should have been my indication that he wasn't going to be able to help me fix the problem, but again.. naive.

We could have been friends.. but noooooooo.

While all this was going on, I spoke to Teh SC Greyhound neighbor (who we were dog sitting for) to explain some of the issues we were having.  We agreed that she shouldn't come home right away, but that I needed her to be aware of the issues. 

I ended up leaving my brand new laptop at Best Buy with no idea of when I'd get it back.  Depressed, I headed home.  Teh German was outside (where it was no less than 98°F outside) washing Baloo.  The soap was drying and I helped him by rinsing since he refused to wash then rinse sections.  Have I mentioned lately how stubborn he is?  Anyways...  He said he had already cleaned the sinks, so I went inside and called Teh Running Bestie to chat while I cleaned the toilets.  After the toilets were cleaned, I started working on the puzzle while we chatted.  Eventually Teh German came inside and showered. 

Teh German puzzles vs Teh Megan puzzles....

After I got off the phone, we tried to make a dinner plan but I wasn't feeling it.  My motivation level was at the bottom of the scale.  I had planned to make chicken enchiladas and the chicken was cooked (yay crockpot), but needed to be shredded and then the enchiladas stuffed and baked and that was just too much effort for me.  I ended up mostly skipping out on dinner and I don't even remember what Teh German ate. 

Dinner of champions.  I didn't eat the entire cup.
So yah know, moderation.

Teh German has this habit of constantly perusing the Facebook Marketplace for "things" and he actually found some runner steps for Baloo for a super low price.  The only hitch was that they were located in GA and he'd have to drive down there to fetch them.  I told him to go for it and he made plans for a drive to GA on Sunday.  It ended up working out super since the seller was even willing to help Teh German install them when he picked them up. 

Later, we went over to Teh PT House for celebratory smoking hour since they had upgraded their vehicle situation. 

Carpet cleaner use since Friday at 0515: 5

SUNDAY

Sunday morning, Teh German got up with the beasts.  He ended up coming back to bed until his alarm went off, at which point he got up and got ready and I checked my phone since I wasn't able to go back to sleep.  I had a massage scheduled at 2 (a neighbor is an LMT and she was coming to the house), but since Teh German was already out (which wasn't planned when I made the appointment), I messaged her and told her if she wanted to bump up the appointment time, that worked for me.  We agreed on doing it at 1 and I took the time to social media, write up the weekly menu, make a store list, and hit up Walmart (ugh) and Bilo.  I still didn't find everything I needed, so I'll be making a trip to Publix at some point, but that's fine. 

I didn't realize when I had Yurtle cleaned that they had folded the blankets and put them in the back.
SUUUPPPPPEEERRRR impressed with Tidal Wave.  I wish they were closer.

I made it home by 1215 and Roux's Humom, Teh PT Family, and Teh Dental Hygienist came over to meet Sweet Tea.  Everyone left when the masseuse arrived.  We set up right in the living room, which was fine with me.  Amazingly, the dogs were angels and other than the power flashing due to some crazy storms, there were no disturbances. 

Tired dogs are the best dogs.

She was awesome and I happily recommended her to several people.  Teh PT Wife had brought in a box when she came in and it was my new, correct color, Kindle. 

Side story: I accidentally ordered a black Kindle on Prime Day and didn't realize until it was too late to cancel it.  So I ordered a 2nd Kindle in the color that I wanted.  Because it was so late in the day, it wouldn't arrive till later.  Boooo, hiss. 

I happily added my stickers to my Kindle, put the case on and I was messing around on it when Teh German arrived home.  The 7 makes me sooo much happier than the 10.  It's not as heavy in my hands and I can tap to turn the pages!  I'm trying to figure out what to do with the Kindle 10 now and I seriously have no idea.  There is currently no trade-in option for it either.  :(

After checking out his new steps (which would have made getting in and out of Baloo much easier 6 weeks ago), I showered and got ready for a birthday dinner at Swig and Swine.  We got to ride in Teh PT Husband's Hummer-limo sized truck (a Toyota Tundra).  When we got home, we were locked out of the house!  We couldn't figure out what was going on.  Teh German asked me if I locked the door (from the garage to the house) and I laughed at him and said, "I never lock any doors!" 

Luckily, I have a house key on Yurtle's fob and I was able to let us in.  Teh German was almost afraid to come in after I walked in and said, "Oh shit."  I walked into the house and the downstairs was littered with dog collars and various items that were in a container in the closet.  A closet that I had, apparently, not closed the door to after I put something away before we left.  #lessonlearned

The dogs had a blast while we were gone.  Phil's muzzle had been chewed up, Pax's racing muzzle had been chewed up, the buckle was eaten off the paracord collar Teh Sister made for Phil.  Toys that I had been hoarding were strewn about the house.  It was like they had a party without us.  It was so exciting that they locked the deadbolt on the door!  Fortunately, only a collar was destroyed in the party, so that's a positive. 

After we got everything cleaned up, Teh SC Greyhound Neighbor arrived to pick up Edie and Sweet Tea.  We chatted about Edie and my concern over her lack of eating and her not greeting anyone when they came in.  Edie really wasn't interested in getting off our couch, so Teh SC Greyhound Neighbor had to pick her up.  When she put her on the floor, Edie was knuckling and Teh German and I saw it and exchanged a look that Teh SC Greyhound Neighbor didn't miss.  On our way to the car, she asked me to tell it to her straight and I said that knuckling is a neurological issue... or it could just be that Edie was laying funny and her foot was asleep.  Time would tell.  Edie was supposed to go to the vet today, so I have my fingers crossed.

After our house was settled again, Teh German and I headed over to Teh PT House for a little bit.  Shortly after 9, I decided it was bedtime and we ran home in the ran.  Yep, I ran.  Not like a sprint.. but more effort than I'm used to.  Once home, we did our pre-bed chores and passed out.  Pretty sure I didn't move all night I was so tired.

Final carpet cleaner use count for the weekend: 7
This means that we're going to have to fully clean the runner downstairs again and pull it outside to dry, as well as the rubber mats underneath.  Kind of a pain in the ass, especially on a week where it's going to rain.  Le siiiiiigh.

______________________________________________

Teh German said it was a productive weekend and I guess it was.  Truthfully, I didn't feel all that productive and I kinda felt lazy, but there was an undercurrent of frustration the entire weekend at all the vomit, shit, and piss in our house.  The party the dogs had last night made them soooo tired that no one budged this morning until it was actually breakfast time.  Generally, the dogs will move around in the mornings while we get ready, but not this morning.  I anticipate many naps throughout the day for them today and hopefully tomorrow too since it's scheduled to rain all week long.

This week is kinda busy.  PT Mon/Thurs.  The builder will be coming on Weds to make repairs (hopefully) and Yurtle has an oil change that day.  Friday we have dance lessons and then a birthday bar-hop to attend.  Next weekend will be kinda hectic since our Saturday is already full.

Tomorrow is everyone's favorite post, Shit Teh German Said!

Gratuitous dog photos:

Oh yeah and I just want to share this kick in the pants with you: 107 days till wedding day.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. 
Additionally, 14 days until Teh German no longer has a choice about what he wears.

Five on Friday #115

EINS

Another no-Wednesday post week.  #notsorry.  Truthfully, I just didn't have enough to "confess".  I think instead of confessions I just need to change my prompt to "It's Ok..."  I give self-guilt myself about a lot of things and I just need to let myself off the hook.  I am my own worst enemy.

For instance...

It's ok..

...that I ripped the sheets with my brace on Monday night.  #shithappens and I can do nothing about it.  It just sucks that those are some of my favorite sheets because they are so soft.  BUTTT, this does give me a reason to finally replace the sheets (as if we really need replacements) since I also may or may not have bleached the pillow cases with some benzoyl peroxide cream after Teh German moved in...

...that I just (re)discovered that my keyboard has function keys to control Spotify.

...that I've planned a Nerd day on Saturday (after we clean the bathrooms and take the dogs for a nail trim) since my new Kindle arrived on Thursday and my new laptop arrives today.

...to wait after new toys arrive to tinker with them since I'll be busy all day today with work/Ortho appt/shooting a wedding.

...to wear jeans to work, especially when wearing dresses means wearing another outfit under my dress so I can wear my brace.. and well, that's just too many layers for Charleston summer.

...to put off work because it's not high priority right now to compose this post.  The formatting is a nightmare that will require some serious dedication and it just seems like too much effort my first week back at work.

...to work half days at the office as I "ease" myself back into being at the office.

...that I didn't get this post done before my doctor's appointment on Friday...  Which leads us tooooooo.....

ZWEI

The Hip Update:
Ortho informed me earlier that I could have been out of my hip brace 2 weeks ago/the 1 month/4 week mark.  I tried to set him on fire with my eyes but failed.  That would have saved me a set of sheets and a lot of shitty sleeps. 

Good sides to this:
-No more brace.
-I can actually work on things at PT.
-I'm mostly healed.
-No more driving restrictions.
-No more ripped sheets.
-Better sleeps.
-Less guilt over not wearing my brace.

Bad sides:
-No more external lap band/sweat band, which was certainly helping with the wedding diet.
-What the fuck do I do with a $1000+ hip brace and $(how ever much I paid for) crutches?

DREI

From my phone:

That car is same color as Teh Mom's favorite color of nail polish when I was a kid.
The car even turned iridescent in certain light.

The start of the idea for my wedding band design.
Actually this band, but swap the rose and white gold.

We're dog sitting this weekend.
Edie is the fawn, Sweet Tea is a pocket pit (back against the fence) and you know who Meri and Pax are.

Meri stood in that position for a solid 2 minutes until Sweet Tea finally decided to play.

She likes 'em big... and fluffy..

Edie likes to marinade her brain and get smarter.

There is a car wash place beside the PT office and I splurged and bought a month's membership.
This means Yurtle will be getting a bath every time I go to PT.  The initial job they did was worth the month's membership fee!  It's crazy how shiny and pretty she is!

New ID.  Yaaarrrr matey.

VIER

From my brain:

-I still need to buy sudafed.  Having to purchase it from a pharmacy annoys me.

-It bothers me that there is no orientation for The Citadel for veteran day students.  It would be nice to have someone take me around and actually introduce me to the school rather than go to a webpage and download a map and hope for the best.  Also, maybe I've been ruined by NCSU, but when the shit can I finally pay for parking? 

-I need to go backpack shopping.  I love my backpack, but the beverage holder on the side is too small and ripped and it makes me sad.  I need to find a backpack with extra padded straps like this one, but at least moderately cute.

-I was honest about why I was returning a Kindle that I ordered on Prime Day.  I accidentally ordered a black one and the order couldn't be cancelled so I had to accept it and just purchase another one.  To get the color that I wanted, yellow, I had to make another order.  Which means now I have to return the black one and I'll be paying $3 to return it since it was my own mistake.  I probably could have lied and said it was wrong, but I'm going for some good karma.

-I have no idea what I'm wearing to the wedding I'm shooting in 2 hours.  I should work on that.

-When you ask someone to dog sit for you, here's a few tips:
1. Do not bring your dogs to the beach to wear them out and let them guzzle down salt water if you know it gives them ass pee. 
2. Do not start your dog on a new food the day you drop them off with the dog sitter.  Again, ass pee.
3. Breakdown your dog's daily life for the sitter so they can know what to expect from your dog(s).  When the dogs expect to be fed helps the sitter understand why your dog is acting so weird at a particular time.  What time the dog wakes up tells the sitter when they can expect to need to let the dog out.

You can ask our dog sitter, I leave an obnoxiously detailed note when we leave the dogs.  This is to help my dog sitter help me.  We keep Meri and Pax on a consistent schedule because our life works better when they are on a schedule.  Everyone knows what to expect.  Dogs thrive on consistency.

-I've ran the carpet cleaner 2x in less than 12 hours and it makes for an unpleasant day.

-I will be working normal work days next week and I'm kinda dreading it.  Additionally, we have customers visiting and I'm considering wearing my hip brace so they will stay out of my way.

-I have high hopes my ring won't be super expensive.  We're planning on buying 2 sets of rings.  A real ring and a silicone ring for each of us.

-I really feel like I need a brain dump, but I've noticed I've started to censor here and it makes me sad.

FÜNF

10 things that made me happy this week:

1. NO MORE MOTHER FUCKING HIP BRACE.
2. I remembered our anniversary (8/2) last night and I thought of the perfect gift for Teh German.. oh and I already bought it.  #likeaboss
3. Ridiculous ID pictures.
4. New technology (my new laptop arrives today at some point and the new Kindle should be here on Monday).
5. Clean Yurtle.
6. New stickers
7. Dog sitting (I should caveat this with the fact that doesn't include the stress that the dogs wouldn't eat, one was afraid of me, and I've already had to use my carpet cleaner 2x in the last 24 hours).
8. Being back at work and having a routine.
9. Watching some Grey's Anatomy.
10. Making appointments to take care of shit that needs to get handled that I've put off and put off...  (dermatologist, Yurtle doc appointment, hair cut, massage, Dan Ryan repairs, dance lesson, etc).

Happy Friday, Gentle Readers.

Confessions {8/31}

-Coupons make me buy things.  I hate that it works on me.  Butttt it does.  Thank you McDonalds for that B1G1 breakfast sammich.  #notsorry #hadtouseitbeforeitexpired

-Sometimes I remember random things and it makes me laugh.  Like when I worked at Texas Roadhouse and had to hide the weed in another server's purse because it was just laying out in the open for everyone to see.  #goodteamplayer

-Young Adult Megan was full of sketchy life choices.  It's impressive I made it through my early 20s.  #poorlifechoices #safetyschmafety

-I've been contacted no less than 3 times by someone from Z5media wanting to present me with an offer for canIdecideanotherday.com.  Has anyone ever actually responded to those people?  If so, what do they want?  Am I about to make it big?  LOOOOLLLL

-Our power bill for the month of August was $179.  That's almost $100 less than what I paid last August for Shitty House.  Have I mentioned lately how much I love our Haus?  Because seriously.  It's the best.

-Our Hue set up is almost complete.  Teh German suggested (weather depending), we put the Hue bulbs outside for Halloween.  We'd totally be the party house.  #Huelightaddiction #planners

-Despite helping Shitty House Owner by forwarding the emails from the property management company, I still got ZERO reply from him.  I fucking hate everything about him and hope he suffers from some serious karma.  Let me just remind you that his email is (name)@abunchofidiots.com.  Same guy.  Same, upstanding citizen..  #DIAF

-I've already checked us into our flights for Thursday morning.  #notsorry #Disneybound

-I'm actively stalking my new Kindle.  As in, if it had GPS, I'd be watching that bitch ride around CHS.  #stalkermode

-Last night, I threw all of my/our running gear in the suitcase.  If we had to pull up chocks and quickly depart, at least we'd have our running stuff.. and a sweatshirt each.  #priorities

-I know I don't need another Disney mug, but I'm seriously already thinking of items I'm going to buy while we're there.  This list includes: Heel/shoe ornament, possible shirt/wearable item (although I'm getting the race shirts, but they aren't really my faves based on the ones we got from the Princess run), separate ornament to celebrate our first Disney trip together (this can't be the same as my running ornament), PINS.  Truthfully, there aren't a lot of items I'm really wanting.. but I know that changes when I get to the parks and I get in the "OMG I'M AT DISNEY must buy all the things" mode.  #Disneylife

-I have purchased 5 books in the last week, which means that I consider these "must read" books, otherwise money = wasted.  I'm not overly enjoying A Man Named Ove and I really am considering returning it to Audible, but I kind of want to know what happens, but mostly I don't.  The writing style is bothering me, and I know that is a Megan problem.  I saw so many good reviews for the book, but people said the same thing about The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo and that was equally painful.  I think I just talked myself into returning it.  Lesson: Swedish authors are NOT my jam.  #lessonslearned

-August 2015:

The excuse I used to get my first photo of Teh German on the sly.
He knew.
I'm not slick.
At all.
#notsorry

A date with Teh German

Running besties!

How many fucks do I give?
ZERO fucks.

Beach walk with Teh German.

Silly selfies within the first month?
I probably could have guessed he was a keeper then.

Weekend Review {8/29}

So uhhhh, August is gone.  I'm not overly sorry to see it go, to be honest.  Historically, August is a very tumultuous month for me.  In more recent years, that hasn't necessarily been the case as much.  Nonetheless, this August was hot and miserable and I am still ticking down the days until Disney and if it could just be September 1st already, that'd be greatttttttt..

FRIDAY

Friday was a weird day at work since it was our last day in our old office.  I'm glad that we're finally done with that office because being on the verge of something like a move is always more stressful for me than actually moving.  That and I hate being in transition.  My stuff was half at the new office and half at the old.  On Friday morning, I went ahead and brought over the remaining items that needed to be moved with the exception of my laptop.  When I got back, I tried to resist the Disney pull, but couldn't.  #ALLTHEDISNEY!!!! 

Since it was our last day at that space, Company had lunch brought in for everyone from Cru Cafe.  It's a place that has been on my Yelp list, so I was excited to try it.  I was disappointed though.  I almost had the turkey sammich, but gave it up for the chicken salad for Twin Dad who hates mayo.  I don't think the turkey would have been much better than the chicken salad, and it wasn't bad, but it wasn't anything worth going out of the way to get.

After lunch, I was burning time till I left at 1:30.  It was a close call to boredom because I had moved my laptop charger to the new office and was fully reliant on the battery which was draining quickly.  I ended up shutting the computer down to leave with 9% of the battery remaining.  If you've ever been scuba diving, you know that the deeper you go, the more oxygen you consume due to pressurization.  Yeah, I feel like that also happens when you're operating on battery juice.  The less you have, the more you use. 

Almost like the day I started.

I headed out and went straight to my massage appointment at the technical school.  I discovered gold recently when I learned there is a massage school in Charleston and it's not too far from our house (about halfway between home and work).  Also, $35 for 90 minutes?  Yes, please, and thank you.  No tipping allowed?  HELLLS YEAHHH BEECHES!  Truthfully, it wasn't the best massage ever, nor did I expect it to be, but it did feel good, so I'm not complaining.. much.  Also, they should give you an email survey to fill out instead of a piece of paper immediately after.  It wasn't until I got home and was thinking about it and realized why my triceps were sore that I realized it was from too much pressure.  Also, I didn't get a scalp massage, and between that and a face massage, it's hard to decide which I like more.  It's essentially my massage happy ending.  Nonetheless, $35 massage.

I headed home to wait on Teh German to get home.  I finished up a challenge book.  Teh WJL had forwarded me an email about Audible's sale going on and I re-signed up with my original Audible account (so the books would all be on the not-sequel account) so I could get the discounted rates.  I ended up getting Dragonfly in Amber (Outlander 2), A Man Called Ove, Code Name Verity, and The Last Anniversary.

Right before Teh German came home, I received an email from Shitty House Owner asking me to forward him the emails from the property management company discussing shed access.  Because I'm an overly nice person, I forwarded him the emails, but also included a note detailing how it was even discovered that all of his crap in the shed (which he clarified was worth about $32,000) and if the mistake hadn't been made, no one would have known for at least a year, unless he had come to check on the shed.  I actually called Teh MD-AR and read her the email before I sent it because I wanted to make sure that I wasn't out of line in the way I wrapped up the email, but I wanted to make sure it was on the record somewhere that he had been negligent towards the house.  I blamed the shed, but it seems like he is just that type of person.

We had plans with Neighbors to go out to Sushi 101 for dinner, so after I finished responding to his email, around 6, they picked us up and we headed to dinner.  Right in time, since 15 minutes after we were seated, the restaurant went from a quarter full to people waiting at the door.  Our food did take a while, but we were chatting, so it wasn't too bad.  After dinner, Neighbors showed us houses they were looking at for his mom and then brought us home so we could release the hounds.

We spent the evening being lazy.  Teh German tried to watch the Patriots/Panthers game, but was having technical difficulties.  Meanwhile, I was trying to troubleshoot my Kindle since it wasn't accepting the books I was trying to side load.  I ended up factory resetting my Kindle to see if it would accept books.  Much to my dismay, it did not work AND I lost all my puzzle accomplishments.  Which I know doesn't really matter, but it does when you have completed all but 3 of the goals and you have 508 stars for all your completed puzzles, it totally does.

As I was falling asleep, I thought that maybe if I backed up from a restore point I could get my puzzle data back.  I didn't sleep well Saturday night because technical malfunctions stress me out.  Especially when it's my reading machine so close to travel time.

SATURDAY

I BOLTED out of the bed at 6:45 on Saturday morning in a white-hot panic that it was Tuesday morning and it was daylight outside and Teh German was still asleep beside me and how the shit did he not hear his alarm going off and OMG he's going to be late for work and be stressed and grouchy.. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh fuck. 

My abruptness woke Teh German up and while I'm having 2 minutes of thoughts in about 5 seconds, he mumbled out a "What?" about the time that I realized that it was actually Saturday and he hadn't heard his alarm because there was no alarm and it wasn't because I slept with an earplug in.  I crawled back in the bed with a pounding heart and Teh German cuddled me.  3 minutes later, we both had to pee, and Teh German offered to feed the beasts.  Once we were all reset, we fell back asleep until 10.  This is what happens when I stay up too late troubleshooting.  I sleep too long.

Teh German and I got up and started playing around on social media while we ate a small breakfast.  Then before we lost motivation, we started doing choirs.  I negociated my way out of scooping poop by tell Teh German I would vacuum the entire house without asking him to help.  I got the shitty end of the deal.  I'm kind of OCD about the floors.  So not only did I vacuum, I also beat off the rugs and the dog beds and vacuumed the dog beds and couches, but I also we ahead and swiffer mopped while I had everything up since it hadn't been done since the Haus warming party.  I hadn't even started vacuuming the stairs or upstairs when Teh German came in from doing the yard work (scooping poop, mowing the grass, and edging). 

It took me a total of 3 hours to vacuum the entire house and "mop" the floors.  I also dusted off the table and vacuumed the base boards that obviously needed it.  I finished vacuuming right in time to get my stinky sweaty ass in the shower before we needed to leave to head to the hair cut place for our appointments at 2:30.  I broke my promise and asked Teh German to lay the bathroom rugs back down, but I replaced all the living room rugs for Phil.

We arrived to the hair cut place right on time.  It's a place that Teh German found about a month ago and he liked the lady that cut his hair.  I knew I needed mine cut as well, so I just made an appointment at the same place at the same time.  It's hair, it will grow back... but I know better.  The lady that did my hair said it definitely needed to be cut and she asked if I wanted to layers.  I told her I didn't care and just to make it look good and ensure it still would go up in a pony tail.  When she washed my hair, she massaged my scalp, so I enjoyed that.  But then, I started to get scared.  She started cutting, which was fine since I don't have a length fear.  But then she started aggressively floofing my hair.  Know what you shouldn't do to curly hair?  Excessively floof.  I'm not even sure what she was doing, but my hair was a hot mess when I left, despite her "fixing" it. 

Also, let me just admit that I'm aware hair dressers hate doing perms.  I get it.  They are time consuming, they stink, blah blah blah.  2 of the hair dressers were surprised when I told them my hair was permed and not naturally curly, 1 of those was the lady cutting my hair.  She was still aggressively floofing when I told her.  She didn't stop floofing.  Even when she was trying to fix it.  I almost pulled away and said, "Have you ever deal with curly hair, ever?"  I didn't, but holy moly.  Stop floofing the curls.  You're just making them frizzy and I have to walk around like this for the rest of the day.  STTTAAHHPPP.  Also, I later learned that she had cut the front too short and it doesn't want to stay in the ponytail.  I was impressed with Teh German's hair cut until Sunday when he got wet and you could see that she hadn't trimmed one side of his "bangs".  Le siiiigh. 

After hair cuts, we decided to go to Home Team BBQ for late lunch/early dinner.  We had wanted to go on our anniversary evening to recreate our first date, but when Teh German's clutch broke, that was nixed and then we ended up doing Halls instead, so it was fine.  Teh German was starting to get a headache so food was our first priority.  There was a chipotle tostada special and they wouldn't let me try a small sample of the meat to judge how spicy it was, so I ordered it blindly.  Both people behind the counter said it wasn't really spicy, but Teh German and I shared a knowing look that said, they don't get it, but ok.  Truthfully, I suffered through it because it was good, but my mouth and lips were on fire.  Teh German said it was kinda spicy, so for me, it was almost unbearable. 

After we ate, we people/car watched for a bit and chatted.  Eventually, we headed out since Teh German wanted to go to Lowes.  About the time we pulled out of the parking lot, I needed to go to the bathroom.  I actually went so far as to ask Teh German where the bathroom was at the Lowes we were going to so I could plan properly.  He asked if we needed to stop at his work and I admitted that wouldn't be a bad idea.  The bad part of the idea was that Teh German didn't actually remember his alarm code.  Excellent.  So I took care of business while listening to the soothing sounds of the building alarm.  After I finished, we were still waiting on the cops to show up to ensure them that no one was actually breaking in.  It took 15-20 minutes for the lone officer to even meander up in his car.  Long enough that if someone were really breaking in, they'd be gone.

Once the alarm situation was dealt with, we headed to Lowes.  We only needed string for the weed eater.  We ended up with a 100 foot hose, 2 hose holders, 1 thing of string, 1 thing of 2 cycle oil, and we found a pressure washer we're going to get since it's got good reviews and it's on sale for $50 off right now.  Lowes free wifi is seriously a life saver for me.  After about an hour, we finally left and headed home.  Teh German's head was hurting so he relaxed and watched youtube for most of the evening, while I started the process of troubleshooting my Kindle.

So Kindle Fire's come with a program called Mayday which is essentially tech help via web cam where they can also control your Kindle.  It's creepy and awesome at the same time.  I was working with one tech who seemed to know what was up, but then the call got lost when I went to fetch the USB cable to transfer a book manually.  With sadness, I called back and the tech I got didn't even know what Calibre was.  Fantastic.  I explained the issues I was having and she pretty much said she didn't have any idea what was going on and that she was going to escalate me to a technician.  Ok.

The tech was trying to help me restore the Kindle to an old back up, but the screen kept freezing up/going black.  When I told him I was just getting a black screen he noticed that I had an extended warranty and said he would put me in contact with the warrant people to get a new Kindle for me since the black screen was a problem.  /shrug ok.

I had some issues with the warranty lady because she didn't want to use my credit card on file since it it is an Amazon rewards card.  She finally "made an exception" when I couldn't validate any of the other cards listed on the account and when I told her that I was calling through my Kindle and I didn't have a number pad to actually input a card number and she wasn't allowed to put card info in. 

TL;DR: I have a new Kindle HD 10 arriving on Wednesday.  For once, something that Mr. Scrooge did had a directly positive impact on my life. 

It makes me worried that the new Kindle is arriving right before we leave, but hopefully it won't be difficult to set up.  It was after I bought a new case for the Kindle 10 that I started trying to get my current Kindle to cooperate with the book situation.  Of course, it felt threatened, so it started working properly.  Not only did it start working properly, but I also learned a few things.

-.mobi files are better for ebooks than .azw.  Many moons ago, I read that .azw was the proper file to send to a Kindle, so that's what I had been using.  If you use the .mobi format, the books will show up with the covers under the Books tab, which hadn't been happening.

 -When using Calibre, don't allow Calibre to email .azw files to Amazon.  Amazon doesn't accept them.  Oops.  If you email them (correctly) to Amazon, not only do they show up on your Kindle, but also in the Kindle app.  Meannnninnngggg... if you have the Kindle app on your computer/phone, you can read there as well.. and it syncs.  Granted, the book will show up under Documents\sent-to-device and not in the Books tab, but for the ability to read across all my platforms, I'm willing to sacrifice titles not showing up under books for the ability to read and sync across platforms.

I got a few books loaded onto my Kindle and started reading my final challenge book, Forever, Interrupted.  In the beginning, I was bitter for being hooked so quickly, but I stayed up until midnight:30 to finish the book, so it was pretty good.  Also, challenge COMPLETE. 

I know I shouldn't be so caught up in what Goodreads is judging me for saying, but after seeing 4 books behind, I got a little obsessive.  Well, now I'm 4 books ahead... and I have 4 audiobooks, 2 hard copies, and several ebooks to read.  #cantstopwontstop

I reviewed the book so I could wind down and fall asleep, which was nearly impossible. 

SUNDAY

Another startle awake on Sunday morning, but not as bad as Saturday morning.  I think the dogs heard something and they both shot up, which woke me up too.  Ugh.  I got up and fed them and let them out, then we all went back to bed.  I continued reading Bossypants, which is still not sucking me in.  Eventually, Meri got up on the bed for snuggles and Teh German woke up, so reading was put to the side for family snuggles. 

We had plans to meet some of Teh German's coworkers at Triangle for brunch, then we were headed out to the Charleston Harbor on a boat around 2.  Brunch was successful, then we headed to grab a bag of ice, then meet everyone else at the marina.  The clouds had started rolling in, but we were still fine.  Our boat wasn't ready, so we walked back to the restaurant we had passed to continue our drinking while we waited.  30 minutes later, our boat arrived and was cleaned and we were headed out.  We were warned that storms were coming and to dock if we could, if we were caught in the storm. 

First we headed into the bay towards the Ravenel Bridge and the USS YORKTOWN.  After photos were accomplished and everyone emptied their bladders, we loaded back up and headed towards Isle of Palms and into Shem Creek.  The waters were rough and we could see the clouds headed our way and that it was raining, so we went around the other side of the storm towards James Island and Folly Beach.  We were able to get some tube time in, which was fun, abet mildly painful.  Let's just say that I definitely got some good salt water rinses done on my sinus cavities.

Charleston Battery

Bridge selfie!
With my Troll-esque hairs.

Love dat Bridge.

Fishing boats at Shem Creek

Fishing boats and paddle boarders.

Headed into the riverway to get some tubing on.

Charles Towne Landing, a historical thing in Charleston
(students in SC learn about it)

Storms avoided

Selfies with Boyfran.

We had to be back by sunset and as we were almost to the marina it started raining.  By the time we pulled up to the marina, it was pouring.  I grabbed our duffle bag with our stuff in it and tried to put it under my towel and headed to cover with Teh SC Teacher.  I rang out my towel twice just get my clothes put on.  I ended up free boobing and free ballin' because it was easier than dealing with a wet swim suit.  Also, I had consumed a nalgene full of adult "juice" so I had zero fucks to give. 

We had planned on eating at the restaurant where we had gotten drinks, but they were closed.  We redirected to Mex 1 since Mexican was a drunk crowd pleaser.  Some members of our group were overly drunk and I don't think our poor server was prepared for that.  I have the ability to be very sober acting while pretty intoxicated, so I essentially took charge at the table.  By the time we were finished eating, I was overly annoyed because no amount of drunkenness helps me tolerate certain things.  I was almost sober by the time checks came, so I drove home. 

I was feeling a little guilty because we got home around 8:30 and that's wayyyy late for the dogs, who normally eat dinner at 5-6pm.  Teh German helped me take care of the dogs, then it was time to shower the salt water off and get to bed.

________________________________

Overall, an outstanding weekend.  I'm sure I'm special in that I am glad I cleaned the floors for 3 hours.  I like a clean house and all those hours make me feel even prouder.  Also, the fact that I spent 3 hours just cleaning the floors should explain why I could never hire someone to clean my house.  I have really, realllllyyyyy high standards. 

I was hoping for more time in the harbor/under the Bridge, but the waters were so choppy that I was having to hold my boobs and I was over that.  Also, there would have been no tubing in the harbor, so it was good that the storms ran us away. 

Extra yays for discovering what emailing a book actually means for my life (no more brainless Insta/FB scrolling since I READ now)!  Extra YAYs (in caps) for a new Kindle.  Despite getting the book situation worked out, I was still getting the black screen of nothingness, and having already lost all my puzzle progress and it not coming back, I had nothing to lose by saying yes to a new Kindle.  I had the option to get a refurbished Kindle HDX 8.9 (like I have), but I went with the 10 upgrade since #whynot.

Final YAYs for it FINALLY being DISNEY WEEK!!!!  (And for finally being in the new office, even though I get to claim "first" for being the first one to lock myself out of our space because my access badge was missing (it had fallen off my laynard and onto the floor and I hadn't noticed until I went to my car and was trying to find it to get back in the building).)