Showing posts with label sexism. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexism. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 4, 2018

On Babies and Procreating.

I have a struggle.  It's about babies.  It's about not wanting them or wanting them.  It's about people's judgement and comments.

This is not a new struggle for me.
But what had happened was...

When I was sitting with the tax dude while he was doing our taxes, he said something about having 2 kids and I said, "I have 2 fur kids, it's a shame I can't get a tax credit for them."  He said, "So no human kids... yet."

Queue some Megan rage.

Just because my body contains the tools to reproduce doesn't mean I am obligated to use them.

That's the thing about humans, we can make choices about our bodies (ya know, for the most part, barring any government regulation, which is a can of worms we're not getting into right now).

Obviously, this is not the first time I've heard this comment, nor will it be the last.  "Yet," it really, really irks me... because at the end of the day, my reproductive business is no one else's business.  That's just how that works.

And then.. a few days later, a coworker brought her month-old infant to a work party so we could all meet him.  He was adorable.  I wanted to hold him, NBD, but I wasn't going to push everyone out of the way to be like, MY TURN BITCHES.  And after the other interested parties held him, he was passed on to me.. and never taken away.  He was cute and he wasn't crying and he was like a little lump.

And then what had happened was:
1- I waffled between being tired of holding him and wanting to put him in his carrier and just wanting to hold this cute, not crying infant because he was adorable and I hadn't gotten to meet him before and it's a baby, there's nothing shameful in holding a baby.
2- I felt (mysteriously) obligated to hold him.  Like, if I put him down my coworkers would think me heartless.  But I knew that by continuing to hold him, my coworkers were all thinking, "I know who is next! Tehehe."
3- I would move the baby around and everyone would hold their breath or comment that I was going to drop him.  Cue Megan rage.  Several times I had to say to someone who made a comment, "Is he crying?  Is he still alive?  Yes, and yes.. So he's fine and I'm fine and we're fine.  Thanks."

And then, Mom and Dad were ready to leave and I handed the baby back and guess what.. my uterus didn't explode from wanting.  I continued on about my day like I do.  Holding that infant didn't change my mind about my reproductive choices.  In fact, it kind of cemented my feelings even more.

There's even photographic evidence!

Maybe my reproductive choices are the problem.  And by THE problem, I mean MY problem.  Because I don't really want kids, but I'd be willing to use my tools maybe.  Teh German and I have discussed it several times and right now, we've both agreed that we do not want kids at this time.  I think what really gave Teh German pause was when I asked him why he wanted kids.  Because society/his family said so?  I'm not interested in that reasoning.... and here's why...

I told Teh German that if he really wanted to have kids, we would do it.  But it would be after I finished school.  Because I MATTER.  My priorities matter and, let's just be real for a minute, my body and time will be the most effected for the immediate time.  I also had to explain to him that all the fun stuff we do now (which he really enjoys) would definitely taper off.  Not because we're not awesome anymore, but because our priorities will have to be reevaluated to meet the demands of a tiny human.  The reality is, I'm not going to be the only one "sacrificing" because of a spawn.

Coincidentally, while I was typing this up waiting on my math class to start, a cadet was asking our professor about his day as "Mr. Mom."  I happily interjected and said, "Most people just call that, 'being a dad.""

These attitudes needs to change.
Because someone has a uterus doesn't mean it is their SINGULAR PURPOSE to create offspring and take care of those offspring.  Oddly enough, it takes two individuals to (naturally) make an offspring (in the case of humans at least) and "the nuclear family" is actually a pretty new concept.  People used to live in villages and everyone took care of everyone else, to include other's children.  Example: infants being fed from whatever female could nurse the baby.  It didn't have to be the mother.  Milkmaids were real.  They are not just from a song.

Additionally, the working woman has been around for forever.  Except that, women.had.help.  It's maybe amusing to imagine the caveman always being away hunting and the woman staying home to tend the farm and children.. but it wasn't like the man and woman lived all alone.  They.had.help.

Today, that same type of help isn't as prevalent.  This very much influences my decision to procreate.  Would I mind having a child if I know that I could go to work (which I do because I enjoy working) and someone I trust would be around to take care of the baby?  Maybe not as much.  Except that I still don't know WHY I should have a kid.  There is no reason that I, Megan LastName, NEED to procreate.

I don't need to pass on my genes for the human race to survive.
I don't feel an obligation to see what Teh German and I could create in a tiny human.
I mean, yeah, the science is cool, but the whole, still having to take care of it for forever and it getting to a stage where it talks back and acts like me doesn't surpass the thrill of "ooo, what could we make?"  It never will for me.  And also, I've seen our Snapchat face-swaps.  We should not procreate.

So this is me saying, fuck it.  Fuck whoever tries to make me feel less for not wanting children.  Especially fuck anyone who expects me to procreate because I have a uterus.  Fuck anyone who tries to tell me that I'm missing out/kids are worth it/it will fulfill me/whatever other possible reason/blah blah blah.  




In case you were waiting on it (because I sure was for a long time), this is your permission to reflect on your desires and make your own decisions.

This is your permission to be honest about YOUR desires, to tell society and whoever else to STFU because you will do what YOU want to do with YOUR body and that you have NO obligation to do whatever they did or what they expect you to do.

It is YOUR right, as a human
to make your own decisions.
Do that.



Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Confessions {10/12}

-I want to say I saw red, but in fact, I saw no colors I was so angry last week when Teh Dad said to me, "I told Teh German this was when boys were separated from men and he's a man's man."  We were discussing Teh German's worry about the impending hurricane.  It really blinded me when he added, "You just wouldn't understand.  It's a MAN's duty.  You will never understand."  There was an absolute silence after that because I was 1- overwhelmed by the catastrophic avalanche of things tumbling around my brain, 2- I was certain that if Teh Dad's didn't already have diminished hearing, he would be left with NO hearing when I was done with him, 3- I had more important things to do (prepare for a freakin' hurricane) than argue with my parent over gender roles and relationships.

-I was pleasantly surprised at how helpful and friendly people were at Walmart, pre-hurricane.  No one was rude or bitchy to each other until I got to the check out.  Then some lady was berating some dude for leaving a cart in between registers that wasn't even his.  Get a clue people.  #somepeopleskids



-I'm not usually overly impressed by toilet paper, but whatever we are using right now is SUPER soft and I just want to rub my face all over the roll.  I think it's Charmin, but I can't remember.  I think we were using Cottonelle before.  It's so soft that I'm considering returning the vitamin E and aloe Cottonelle I got during my hurricane prep and picking up more Charmin on principle.  #supersoft #toiletpapermatters


-I've been looking for an excuse to use that gif again since the first time.  I still have no idea what is going on there.  Not sorry.  #teletubbies

-OMG!  That leads to another confession!  When we were doing our post-hurricane walk with Phil and Meri I noticed a VERY large green blob in the open lot next to the construction.  No one else noticed until I pointed it out and that I knew what it was.  Soooo.. I had this HUGE stuffed Dipsy.  It was in one of the boxes of stuff that Teh Dad sent to CHS with me in August.  I no longer have a need for over-sized Dipsy and he'd been in a box that had rodent visitors, so I there was no saving him.  I tossed him in the dumpster along with several other boxes of trash a few weeks before the hurricane.  Apparently, the dumpster hasn't been emptied in weeks because Dipsy blew out and was terrorizing roaming the neighborhood.  I got ALL the LOLS.  #thisishownightmaresaremade

-I have no will power.  Audible announced a 2 for 1 sale on certain series today.  Outlander was one of the series.  Of course I used my 1 credit for books 3 and 4.  That's 88 hours worth of audiobook for 1 credit.  That's also 88 hours of my life that I'll spend listening to audiobooks.  Soooo many hours.  But that was totally worth 1 credit.  Especially knowing that I will eventually want to read those books.  #somanybooks #solittletime



-I'm pretty sure my newly banged up toe is going to be toe-nail-less soon.  First, I need the swelling to go down to see if I can lift it from the bed.  Second, I need to self-medicate.  Third, I need someone willing to pull it off.  #bodiesaregross

-Gimp Toe 2 gives me a reason to wear awesome bandaids.  #notsorry  #monstersinc  #yesIhavekidsbandaids



-I didn't get Phil a new toy for his birthday, but he got LOTS of treats.  Roux's Humom did give Phil a new toy and he played with it for almost 5 minutes.  He'd stop and then go back and play some more!  It was like he wasn't really Phil.  The older he gets, the more surprises he has for me.  I guess we can consider a visit from his 2nd mommy, Teh MD-AR, a late birthday present?  Phil will be 10 next year and I told him last night I'm not ready for double digits.  #myoldman #philalicious

-I have a Shit Teh German Said post drafted, but I haven't published it yet.  #lazy

-I want to link up for Alyssa's blog not-challenge, except the prompts require thought and thinking is hard.  #blogging



-There are fewer things that make me more excited than cancelled meetings.

-I really dislike when technology doesn't work because it's not developed properly.  For instance.... I have a Macbook Pro for work.  Yet, Microsoft products are the go-to.  This includes the 365 suite, which includes Skype for Business and Skype, which our office uses to communicate.  Except that Skype for Business doesn't love Apple, so it has limited functionality and to schedule an online meeting I have to open the pre-Skype for Business Mac app: Lync.  It took me an hour to figure that out.  #IT2 #techsupport



-I finished our hurricane puzzle on Monday afternoon.  I'm not sure if we'll have time, but I have a puzzle available for Teh MD-AR and I to do while she's here, if we do...  #wefittogetherlikepuzzlepieces



Monday, October 10, 2016

Weekend Review {10/10}

If you saw Friday's post, you know that we were boarded up and preparing for Hurricane Matthew's best.  Well, his best for Charleston was something along the lines of a Cat 1 hurricane.  Truthfully, I haven't done the research to see how much devastation Charleston will be dealing with, but I saw some photos of downtown where water was definitely where it shouldn't have been.  When we went out for dinner on Sunday night, we saw the tree that had taken our power out, still across 1/2 the road.  It was more than just a rain storm, but not too bad, all things considered.

Let's get to the hurricane review!

It kinda felt like a really long weekend.  Matthew became more than a blip on a radar on Tuesday around lunch.  By 3pm, the SC Governor had declared a state of emergency for SC.  Soon after that, county offices and schools announced they'd be closed for the rest of the week.  That still seems a little knee-jerk to me, but I'm not the governor for a reason.  For me, this meant that I'd be teleworking for the rest of the week, as long as I had power.  Teh German went into work on Wednesday, but left after lunchtime and his company was closed for the rest of the week as well.

Wednesday 

Before Teh German left for work, he and I came up with a list of items that I could tackle while he was working.  Unplugging things, bringing the outside stuff inside the garage, laundry, charging all the batteries for the power tools, finding batteries/flashlights, and doing anything that required electricity. 

I accomplished all these things.  When Teh German came home, he said to me, "Thanks for bringing everything inside.  Who helped you?"  I was elated and instantly disappointed.  Elated that he noticed my hard work.  Disappointed that obviously I couldn't have done all that myself.  Mostly, he meant moving the patio table inside on my own, but still.  My girl power heart weeped a little.

Teh Megan: Why did someone have to help me?
Teh German: Well, how did you get the table inside?  It's heavy.
Teh Megan: I used the wagon and just flipped the table upside down on top of the wagon and wheeled it around and flipped it up on the trailer.  But I appreciate all the faith you have in me.
Teh German: You know what I meant!

I did know, but for me, someone who preaches about rhetoric and sexism and choosing your words to mean what you say, it didn't sit well.  It hurt my feelings a little that I'd be so weak as to not be able to accomplish such a menial task like moving the table.  1- I could have asked a neighbor for help.  2- I could have done exactly what I did and used my resources wisely.  Being asked who helped me felt demeaning to me. 

After that, Teh German changed into some manual labor clothes and headed outside where the street boarding-up party was getting started.  Mr. Golfer came over and helped Teh German put up our boards.  While they were working on our house, I noticed that our neighbor was rolling out his boards on his wheelchair to his backyard.  YALL.  I could not even.  My brain wrinkled.  I practically stormed over to his house and told him to stop and to let the able-bodied do the work.  He didn't like it at first, but as some of you might be aware, I'm very persistent.  This was one of those times that I was going to get my way.  He agreed, realizing 2 things.  1- I wasn't going to let him keep doing what he was doing.  2- He would never have finished on his own.  He would have been putting up boards through the night on Thursday and still on Friday when the rain started.

Of course, Teh German and Mr. Golfer and I took care of Neighbor's boards.  We also helped the neighbors 2 houses down from us.  We gathered quite an effective team.  Finally, it was getting dark and we were hungry.  Mr. Golfer headed home, but the neighbors 2 doors down and Teh German and I agreed to go out for Mexican.  It was nice to meet new people and hang out.  They seem to be our age and have similar senses of humor, which is good for Teh German and I since we have very broad funny bones.

After dinner, we made a pit stop at Publix to pick up $50 worth of things: 1 case of water ($4), 3 gallons jugs of water ($0.89 each), 1 gallon of milk ($4), and the rest was beer.  #priorities.  With beverages secured, we headed home.  It didn't take long for us to be ready for bed. 



Thursday

Teh German had his alarm set for 0615 because he is el diablo.  Actually, the opposite of that.  He was getting up early to continue the boarding-up party.  He had his coffee and headed over to Mr. Golfer's house to assist with boards.  After Mr. Golfer's house, they worked their way down the street.  Our across the street neighbor had asked for help with his boards, so they helped him.  His neighbor needed help because her husband is deployed and she's pregnant and home with 2 small children, oh yeah and she's from Guam.  Then, her neighbor needed help (well ladders).  The group hadn't expected to do the middle house, so they grumbled a little bit until I explained the situation.  They wouldn't let a solo mom not have boards on her windows.  Just like I wasn't going to let her stay in Charleston if we evacuated. 

When I thought we were leaving on Wednesday, I had invited her to bring the kids and come to Teh Dad's with us.  I informed Teh Dad after, knowing that he'd be ok with it.  Turns out we didn't leave, so I wanted to make sure that they were taken care of just like we were taking care of ourselves. 

After my morning meetings, I headed over to Roux's Humom's house and dropped off Meri and Phil for play time.  Then I headed to Walmart, to brave whatever I would find.  I needed plastic containers for the boxes Teh Dad had sent home with us the last few times we've been in NC and I figured I could go through those things during a weekend holed up inside (HA! Jokes on me).  I also has some items to get from the food section that had been on my list so I also perused the non-perishables that were left. 

Apparently, people REALLY love chips during hurricanes.  Also bread and toilet paper and pop tarts (except for the smores flavor, to my benefit).


Despite what I figured would be a very long wait to check out, it took an average amount of time.  I wanted to tell the idiots that were standing in the really long line that they were in line for self check out, but nahhhhhh.  After Walmart, I headed to Publix to pick up a rotisserie chicken since I didn't want to wait at Walmart for another 45 minutes for theirs to be done. 

Pizza delivery dog has judgy eyes.
When I got home, I unloaded the car, ate the sandwich I had picked up, and focused on work for a bit.  Eventually, I picked the chicken from the bone and headed out to check on the workers and pick up the beasts.

Pizza showed up in the afternoon for the workers.  Beer steadily flowed throughout the day.  I helped put up some boards, but I was also the beer wench when necessary.  When someone would get grouchy, I'd ask if they needed a beer.  Problem solved.  I had worked on laundry throughout the day to make sure that we wouldn't be going naked on Monday.  As the boarding party finished for the evening, I headed inside to make dinner.  I invited Mr. Golfer and Roux's Humom (who are married) over for dinner.  They said they needed to feed his mom and I sent them with leftovers from Wednesday's lunch to feed her. 

I made chicken and gnocchi soup for dinner and it was delicious.  The men were tired from boarding all day, so after dinner, Mr. Golfer and Roux's Humom left and we were in bed shortly after cleaning up.


Friday

We kinda slept in on Friday.  Teh German got a call from the neighbor asking him to help board up his daughter's house down the street.  Fortunately, he only wanted the bottom done.  His daughter was away on a trip. 

I reassured Teh MD-AR and Teh WJL that we weren't going to float away in the morning, which was also an excuse to get dog selfies.



At some point, the final boards were put up on the upstairs portion of our house, which hadn't been done at first.  I worked some and attended meetings as necessary.  Teh German came home for lunch and we had sammiches.  I did bring Phil and Meri over to Roux's house for some run time so Meri's batteries wouldn't completely recharge before the storm started.  I also brought along the pup-treats I'd gotten for the pups.


Roux got one too, but I didn't get his picture.

In the afternoon, the rain started.  Mr. Golfer and Roux's Humom had invited us over for dinner.  I finished up some work stuff and Teh German came in and showered, the boarding-up party complete.  We watched a few episodes of HIMYM and then we headed over for dinner around 7.  Actually, we started to head over for dinner and I noticed that there was water coming from the freezer, so I had a crisis and had to clean up the water. 

I had filled a few gallon and quart sized ziplock bags halfway with water to serve as ice packs in case we lost power.  I had failed to properly put them in the freezer so they were leaking.  After getting that disaster mitigated and cleaned up, we headed down the street.  After delicious spaghetti (fitting dinner considering all the "spaghetti" models for Hurricane Matthew's predicted path) dinner, we socialized for a bit, then headed back home.  The rain was really coming down by this point and we had zero guilt for driving less than a quarter of a mile down the street for dinner.

When we got home, I stood out in the rain with the beasts praying they would go business.  Phil peed, but that was it.  This meant that Meri was on strike because of the rain, which meant we had to worry about her going business in the house.  Grand.  After drying everyone off, we plugged in all the batteries to charge and headed to bed.  Teh German had to get up for something and I asked him to unplug the Hue lights while he was downstairs.  H came back upstairs and we went to bed, prepared as much as we could for whatever would happen through the night.

This was not proper business attire for the beasts.

Around 11:30, the power flickered.  I had failed to unplug the Hue lights in our room, so we were rudely awakened to some bright ass lights.  I turned the lights off with the app and then we unplugged the lights in our room.  Teh German then said that the lights downstairs were on and I told him I'd turned them off.  He then explained to me that he hadn't actually unplugged the lights, but unplugged the bridge.  So not only were the lights on, the bridge wasn't accessible for me to do anything with the lights.  I was furious. 

I had asked him to unplug the lights in case the power surged.  Also, I was confused.  Why would he unplug the bridge and not the lights?  There was NO logic there for me.  He refused to get up and unplug the lights and I stewed for several minutes and finally got too pissed off and went downstairs and unplugged the lights myself.  When I came back to bed I grouchily said something to the effect of the power surging and killing $1000 worth of lights was completely unacceptable.  Really the unacceptable part to me was that he hadn't listened to me in the first place, which would have meant the entire situation wouldn't have been an issue.  #RAGE

It was a miracle I was able to fall back asleep, but I did.  Throughout the night, I woke up to the sound of the wind and rain.  Also, I was still pissed so my sleeps were crap.  I should have medicated, but didn't because I didn't want to get back out of bed.  Stupid. 


Saturday

We woke up to no power on Saturday morning.  The boards made it nice and dark in our room, but with no power, there was no AC so it was hot.  I got up and fed the dogs and donned a poncho and stood out in the rain with them while they went business.  No poops, but both peed.  I gave up and we all came back inside and dried off.  I delivered a Kind bar to Teh German for breakfast in bed and I had a poptart.  We couldn't get a good signal to check social media and with no power, there was no wifi.  Eventually, we got up and meandered downstairs. 

First we took a selfie.  On my phone you can actually see teeth.
This shows you how effective the boards are at blocking light and
how stupid androids are for not having the selfie flash screen like apple does.

My dive light provided the perfect amount of light.
Why we didn't take a selfie after I turned the light on baffles me too.

Teh German was playing his game on his phone and I was reading on my Kindle.  I could tell Teh German was getting restless, so I suggested he do a puzzle on his ipad.  He was still restless doing the puzzle on his ipad and I was worried about killing my battery so early into not having power, so I suggested we do an actual puzzle.  We had purchased puzzles earlier this year and had never done them, so this was the perfect time! 

I pulled out a piece of wood that Teh German used as a TV stand when he lived at The Closet and put it on the ottoman in the living room.  We sorted out edge pieces and got them together by the light coming from the patio door, which was only boarded up on the top so Meri and Phil could still go out. 


It was the agreement we had made after I told Teh German that I refused to leash 2 dogs, walk through the garage, deal with the gate, let them go business, and go back through all those steps just because he wanted to board up the back door.  No.  He could board up the top of the door, I would deal with ducking under it and not deal with the danger of the gate or hassle of the garage door.  I understood WHY he wanted to board it up, but it wasn't logical with the dogs.  I recently learned that German logic is very black/white and added variables complicate things in their brains... and by their I mean MY German's brain.

By lunch time, the rain had stopped.  The wind was still kickin' though.  Teh German was going stir crazy, so we decided to take Phil and Meri on a trek down the street.  This also meant we could do some damage assessment.  We ran into the neighbors 2 doors down who were also walking their dogs (the pizza delivery dog and the street laying dog).


After our walk, we chatted at our driveway while the dogs got pettins until Phil's legs were shaky.  Then we took the beasts inside and moved the puzzle to the dining room table.  We did puzzle for a while until we were hungry.  Teh German pulled out the grill and I put leftover soup in a pan and we heated it up on the grill burner.  Perfecto.

After dinner, we were invited over to Roux's house since they had a generator running and we could also charge whatever we needed.  Teh German and I were having some serious grumbles towards each other and he stayed home while I went to socialize with the dogs.  If Teh German would have came, we probably would have played a game, but he didn't and Mr. Golfer fell asleep, so Roux's Humom and I chatted for a few hours and then I headed back home with the pups. 

When I got home, we still weren't speaking to each other, so I got dog breakfast ready and headed upstairs with my flashlight to get ready for bed.  I opened the windows, despite the boards, and I exchanged the comforter for a quilt on our bed so we wouldn't be as hot.  I medicated and grabbed the handy dandy battery pack to charge our phones overnight.  I broke the silence to tell to Teh German to hand me his charger and plugged in his phone for him because I'm such a nice person.  Otherwise, he would have woken up to a dead battery.

With nothing left to do, we passed out.


Sunday

We woke up Sunday to still no power.  Teh German had set his alarm to go off at 0615 again, because el diablo, and again, the opposite.  Sunday was the boarding-down/de-boarding party.  Our neighbor came over and helped Timo remove the bottom boards around our house and they continued the party around the neighborhood.  I stayed in bed until Teh German called me to ask if we had power.  I rolled over and checked the light on the power strip beside the bed, and we did, in fact, have power.  Nonetheless, I stayed inside, out of the way, doing puzzle and being not-people-y.  To include being a crappy friend and ignoring Teh MD-AR's group text about starting the Army 10-miler. 

Teh German came in around 1030 and was hungry, so he heated up soup leftovers.  After eating, he headed back out to continue de-boarding with the street gang.  I did puzzle for a while.  Then I got motivated and started the dryer, cooked lentil soup, and showered.  About 5 minutes after my shower, the power flickered a few times and went back out.  Good timing, Megan. 


I headed out to check on the de-boarding party and helped remove lower level boards from one house.  I also relocated all the outside things to their place.  I did have some help this time with the patio table and chairs since neighbors were roaming the streets and it was easy to ask for help.  Especially since the de-boarders were using our wagon.  Right before our top boards were removed, I was moving the grill to the backyard and stubbed my toe on the foot.  But this wasn't just an ouch, my toe!  This was a hiss, cry, cuss stub my toe.  I looked at my foot and knew that if I took off my shoe, my toe would be bleeding.  It hurt too bad not to be bleeding.

I was right.  It was definitely bleeding.  I had ripped the nail back.


I wiped it off, put a band-aid over it, put my sock and shoe back on and limped back to work. The toe was 1 of 2 disasters to strike because of Hurricane Matthew.  This is the other:






In fact, that disaster happened TWICE.  Once again after I was about to hang it on the front porch.  So that poor plant go re-potted twice in one day and if it doesn't die, I'll be impressed.

After getting everything in it's place outside, I headed inside to be by myself and do puzzle.  Teh Dad called and despite not wanting to answer it, I knew he'd just call back if I didn't, I answered.  Our conversation got off to a rocky start (I was still bitter about a conversation we'd had on Wednesday when Teh Dad said I wouldn't understand something because I'm not a man) but after I exploded on him after he told me again I couldn't understand something because I'm not a man.  Things got better.  I even went so far as to tell him that to tell me to "calm down" would be more productive than saying to me, "you wouldn't understand because you're not a man."  Of all the people to say something like that to, I should be the last person what with my very strong views on gender roles.

We did talk through some of my issues with Teh German and his grouchiness.  That was helpful.  I accomplished quite a bit of puzzle while we chatted.  When Teh German finally came home, we ended the call.  I had told Teh German that we were going out for dinner, despite having food available to eat in the house.  I was thinking that getting out would help the situation.

While he showered, I called several places to make sure they were open before I offered them up as suggestions to Teh German.  We first tried Buffalo Wild Wings, but I had forgotten sports bar + Sunday football.  There were no tables available and the 2 seats we found at the bar had been vacated by people who had just went outside to smoke.  Ugh.  We ended up leaving and going to Wild Wing Cafe, where we encountered the same problem.  We got lucky and were able to get a table outside immediately.  Service was pretty slow and check delivery slow as well. 

There was some drama when a guy said, "bless you," to Teh German after he sneezed and since Teh German didn't hear him (which I knew was the case because he wasn't hearing me speak either), he started talking shit.  Of course, I wouldn't let it go and I said he couldn't hear him.  He got an attitude and his friend was trying to get us to stop.  After I was a smart ass and said thank you, I started to ignore him because I knew that I'd run my mouth more if I listened to his retort. 

Finally, I was freezing because now I've completely lost my acclimation for the cold.  It was 70 degrees outside and I was in jeans and a long sleeve shirt and I was shivering.  Granted, hurricane breezes were still blowing a bit, but 70 used to be shorts/short sleeves weather.  I'm ruined.

We came home and prepped dog breakfast and headed straight to bed.  Teh German was twitchy, so I offered to rub his legs since they were sore and he refused.  I was annoyed, so I put a pillow between us so his twitches wouldn't keep me awake and finally fell asleep.  I woke up a few hours later with my toe absolutely throbbing.  Not willing to deal with it anymore, I got up, peed, took a tramadol, put in a set of earplugs, and crashed.

Fall = blankies!



__________________________________
And that's the story of how we survived the weekend of Hurricane Matthew.

Honestly, I expected more quiet time.  I'm glad that we didn't have any damage.  We have some loose vinyl siding, but that's it.  We had zero issues getting our boards up, whereas other houses had to have holes drilled because they didn't fit or because there weren't holes at all.  We also had all the boards we needed, where some people didn't have boards at all or didn't have the correct boards for certain windows. 

The prep tool I was most glad to have was the battery pack I had gotten for Disneyland.  We were able to use our phones as normal and still not have to deal with dead batteries. 

The best thing about this weekend was that we got to meet most of our neighbors.  We learned that we live near some pretty awesome people and we are all willing to help each other out.  I was pretty sure that when our neighbor across the street came home and noticed the boards already off his windows, he almost cried.  He immediately came over and thanked me.  I had to tell him that it was all Timo.  He still thanked me for making sure his house was taken care of while he had been on his shift at the hospital for several days.  He spent the rest of the afternoon with the de-boarding party repaying the kindness on other's homes.  See?  Awesome neighbors.

It was an optional telework day for our office today.  Of course, I'm at home.  I wasn't prepared to deal with whatever issues there were at the office when I could just stay home and be with the dogs for an extra day. 


In extra good news, the tropical storm that was behind Matthew dissipated and is no longer a threat. Additional extra good news, we were so tired last night that staying up for the debate wasn't even.. up for debate, HA!  I did see some Twitter commentary and saw the memes on FB. 

I will say up front that I haven't watched the debate, but I agree that if you support the way some women speak "like the men" (Amy Schumer, Sarah Silverman, etc), then you can't judge the way Trump speaks.  We all know where I stand on sexual assault, but you can't judge one and ignore the other.  That said, Amy Schumer pushes my boundaries too far and she makes me uncomfortable, as does many of the things that Donald Trump says. 

I've spent the last year trying to clean up my speech, in regards to gender-speak.  You won't hear me tell you to "man up" anymore.  Just like you won't hear me say you do anything "like a girl."  Also, adults are men and women, not boys and girls and often I have to correct myself on this.  I try my best to be aware of my PMS symptoms so I can't blame my behaviors on chemical imbalances in my body, no matter how true they maybe, they should never be an excuse for poor behavior.  That said, I will get ragey when my dad says to me, "You'll never understand because you're not a man."  Excuse me?  I may never experience something because I'm not a man, but that doesn't mean I can't empathize or sympathize or understand.  Gender limitations are exactly what you let them or don't let them be. 

Whew, that was off-topic, my bad.  Anyways.  The weekend wasn't what I expected and I need a weekend to recover from the weekend.  Maybe next weekend?

Happy middle of October, Gentle Readers!
Also, tomorrow is books day!  Don't forget!

Final last thing, I promise.
Happy Birthday to Teh Sister!  I made a public announcement at her wedding at she isn't adopted, so now I have to act good-sisterly.  I did give her a card when we saw her in NC last weekend, so I didn't forget, which is a huge first step.  Since they were moving, I wasn't sure what to get her, but I'm sure she'll have some ideas for me in the near future.







Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Confessions {5/25}

-At some point over the last 5 years, I've lost my complete heartlessness and I've turned into a regular old sap.  I was reading about a dog being transported through Meri's rescue and I was fine until the line, "Tomorrow we will tell you about the other dogs and be excited about the start of their new lives. But today is just for Tonka."  #dustyinhere

-Seriously, there are approximately 2-4 people's opinions on Meri's hair that I care about.  If you aren't one of those people (who know who they are), then I don't care what you think about my decision to shave my dog or what you would do if you were her owner.  #notsorry


Gratuitous photo of Phil

-Add this to my list of Bands I'm Missing While We're In Germany: Eve 6.  SERIOUSLY!?!?  Is the music world conspiring against me for some reason?  What have I done to it?  So far the list includes: Death Cab for Cutie, CHVRCHES, Ellie Goulding, The 1975, Weezer, Panic! At the Disco, and now Eve 6.  Other acts/things coming to CHS while we're away: Jerry Seinfeld, Blue Man Group, Ben Folds w/ Charleston Orchestra (which sounds weird, but I bet would be super cool), Kelly Cup Playoffs (possibly).  I know, I know.. "But you'll be in Germany, Megan.."  Yeah well. I'd like to still enjoy local concerts AND be able to go to Germany.

Please let me explain something, Gentle Readers.. this trip to Germany is about meeting the family and Teh German seeing all the friends he's missed since the last time he went home.  It's not about being a tourist (although he did mention something about the Lichtenstein castle to me last week).  It'd be like me saying to him, "Lets go on a 3 week vacation to North Carolina so I can visit all my friends."  Sure, it'd be fun for him to go somewhere he's not been before, except that there's probably other things higher on his list than just visiting NC.

Don't get me wrong, I AM excited to go to Germany.  Yes, I'd rather go to Germany than be here for a few concerts that I might be able to see again another time.  But I'd also prefer that I get to go to Germany AND see all these awesome concerts in CHS.  If I was planning a 3 week European excursion that I've always dreamed about, going to all the touristy places, then I know I wouldn't be lamenting missing these concerts.  But I'm not.  So I'm allowing myself to whine a little.  Most people I've talked to are pretty much all, STFU you're going to Germany, don't want to hear it.  But I AM moderately frustrated about the entire situation (I'm using 3 weeks of vacation and only seeing 1 European country) and I'm trying not to be unappreciative but apparently my fear of missing out (FOMO) is on high right now, but I really think it's misplaced agitation cause by other things (lack of touristing).  #FOMOisreal

-When I think of my leave balance after I get back from Germany, I get sad.  Mostly knowing that the next time I'll be able to do another big vacation like this will be over a year from now if I take zero vacation days between now and the next one.  #needmorevacation


-I am so relieved the Stingrays lost last night.  This means that I don't have to stress out about selling our playoff tickets before we leave (in 2 days) AND I don't lose out/have to spend money.  It was a good run, but damn I'm going to enjoy all my free time on school nights.  Also, I will NEVER do pay as we play tickets again.  #lessonlearned #wavebyetothedollas

-My office apparently thinks that since I'm going on vacation in a few days that NOW is the time to come to me with tasking.  Uhh no.  #vacationbrainstartsearly


-I may be disappointed if I come back to work after being gone for 3 weeks and they haven't pulled some type of prank on me.  Most people are probably too scared to do anything, but the Tasty Tuesday crowd knows me well enough to prank me.  #imscary

-I often give myself a lot of mental shit for rarely cleaning up my digital life.  Well it has come in handy since Teh Sister had her computer worked on and they replaced her hard drive after they cracked it.  It wasn't expected so she lost all the wedding photos.  Fortunately for her, I haven't done much photo organizing in the past 6 months so I still had all the raw files.  #bestsisterever

-Today we are supposed to be getting fence posts and tomorrow the fence.  I forgot to leave the check under the doormat.  #notsorry  I talked about the "good old boy" last week, but he almost got violenced this week.  He insisted on coming on Monday to "check" and see if the tree line had been cleared for the fence.  INSISTED.  As in, I spoke to him on Friday and told him he didn't have to check because I was telling him it would be done.  Yeah well, he still wanted to check, just in case.  There are few things that make me as angry as when I say I will do something and someone insists that it won't happen.  ADD to that, I knew exactly why he needed to come check and make sure it was done... I don't have a penis.  I am 95% certain that if he had been dealing with Teh German or Teh Dad or any other male, he wouldn't have "wanted" to come and check.  THEN Teh Dad kept trying to tell me on Sunday that I should call and remind the fence guy to come and check.  No, no, I will not.  It's not MY job to tell this asshat to do what he said he was going to do.  That was a debacle and then Teh Dad switched sides (maybe a reverse psychology thing?  IDK) and ended up saying I didn't need to call him and I'm like EXACTLY!  It was very confusing. 

So on Monday as I'm geared up to go run errands on Mike, the fence guy pulls up to check on things and make his marks on the grass.  I was wearing my helmet and jacket and the guy acted like he didn't know who I was.  Seriously?  Who else would have approached you in my driveway you fucking moron?  He, of course, is surprised I ride.  I refused to take my helmet and jacket off to make him hurry up.  He then goes to the back yard and says, "Well, Megan.. I am surprised.  I didn't think you'd get it done."  Stop.  Stop talking to me, stop looking at me, break eye contact because I'm going to do 1 of 3 things: punch you in the dick (which you obviously only think with), run into your face at full speed with my helmet on, or walk away.  I went with walk away, but only because my dogs really need a fence but I did respond with, "I'm not sure why you're so surprised.  I've been telling you for a month it was going to be done."  I don't deal well with people second-guessing me.. and when it's coupled with sexism?  Get out of my face.  I do not have time for you.

About 10 minutes of his presence had went by and finally he was done muttering to himself and me telling him how to do his job (I wish I was kidding, but I had to point out to him that our property line was the grass line that he was using since he was trying to figure out how a 10 foot gate was going to fit in a 9 foot space).  He said, "Well, Megan, this is the last time you'll be seeing me, Clyde will take over from here and he will be out on Wednesday to put the poles in and Thursday to put up the fence slats."  Then he proceeded to repeat "put a check under the doormat" in about 6 different ways.  It's really good my helmet squishes my cheeks so that way he couldn't see me actually smiling when he said I wouldn't have to see him again.  #getoutofmyyardyousexistpig #justbecauseyouactnicedoesntmeanyouarentsexist #veiledsexism

-I hated cleaning shitty house.  I love cleaning House.  I swept and vacuumed the entire house yesterday and it was delightful.  It helps that you can actually SEE how clean it is.  #seeingisbelieving

-FB profile photos are such a big deal for me.  I have to find THE perfect photo.  It could take forever.  Or 20 minutes.. just to select a photo.  I really wanted the want with the Hitler 'stache, but thought that just in case people in Germany wanted to friend request me, I'd hold out on that one.  #blastfromthepast

-We're going downtown to the market today to pick up souvenirs for Teh German's people.  This could either be really good or really bad since we are going downtown after we get off work around 4:30.  Hopefully traffic won't be too bad and all the merchants will still be there.  The best part is that this just makes room for stuff when we return!  #wishusluck 






Linking up with:
Life with Lolo
Humpday Confessions with Nadine and Kathy