Friday, December 14, 2018

Five on Friday #176

EINS - Random Shit

-I feel like I'm in some weird time warp.  Since the beginning of November, time has felt like a trance.  An unending trance.  I've been excited about the end of the semester coming, but it didn't hit me until AFTER class on Thursday that it was the final class meeting.  Exams start Saturday (a hurrication schedule switch), but my first exam is on Monday.  I have exams Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday at 0800.  I have one last project to do for a class, in lieu of an exam, so that's on the to-do list.

Part of me feels like November didn't happen at all and part of me feels like November lasted forever and now we're well into December but it still feels like November.  It's just bizarre.

-Dear Amazon Cowl Neck Shirt Makers,
It's a cowl neck, not a fucking hood.  Take it down a level.  I don't understand why a foot of material is used to make a cowl neck.  It just ends up looking like a hot bag of ass and I have to return the shirt.  Ughhh.

-I have the opportunity to be a petty, bitter, bitch and I'm strongly considering taking it.  I know I shouldn't, but the person to which this action would be directed at would deserve it based on their past actions.  But I'm having a hard time being the petty, bitter, bitch that I know I am on the inside.. which just makes me extra know that I shouldn't do it.. BUT IT'S SO HARRRDD (that's what she said).

-Look, I know what I'm about to type is first worldy and whatever.. but I just need to let it out.  At the end of the semester, I always schedule a massage as a reward to myself for another semester survived.  I had my post-semester massage on Wednesday and it was horrible.  The worst massage I may have ever gotten.

When I left, my body felt exactly the same, if not a little worse from the overly high pillow she gave me, except oily.  I visited the Chiro on Monday, which didn't help much since my body is so tight.  I'm still feeling the effects from my half marathon, and I've gone to the gym this week, so that's extra soreness I've added on.  She was sooooo proud of getting out the 3/4 knots in my shoulders that she found (she didn't actually do any such thing.  I know how much pressure it takes to get my knots out and some of them won't come out, ever, despite the insistence of many therapists, she just didn't apply enough pressure to find them again after discovering them the first time).  I'm not only disappointed in the massage, but also pissed that I wasted $100 on 90 minutes of being patted.  If I'd have wanted to be patted, I could have asked Teh German (since that's generally what he does to me if I ask him to rub my shoulders/back).

And yes, I know you can ask for more pressure.. but every time I almost said something, she'd apply more pressure to a different area that didn't need more pressure.  I was afraid that if I asked for more pressure, she'd hurt me AND still be inconsistent so I didn't.  When I walked out, I think she could tell I wasn't truly happy, but my time was up and I didn't want her to offer to fix it since it would probably only piss me off more.  Also, she was using some man-smelling essential oils and it was almost intolerable.  Sadly, I will not be back to the place I had claimed was the best massage place in Charleston.  I was informed when I made the appointment that my favorite therapist had retired in August, but I took the risk.  I chose poorly.

-All of that to say, I scheduled another appointment for Thursday afternoon because everything hurt so bad and my Vibrator (Myobuddy, a percussion massager, not an actual vibrator, but it's fun to call it that in public) isn't enough.  Mostly because I can't really massage my back myself and Teh German was away on travel during the worst of the pain and because he doesn't really do it good.  Teh German doesn't really appreciate my appreciation of more pressure because he doesn't prefer more pressure, so it is difficult for him to massage me the way I want/need to be massaged.

-The 2nd massage was good.. enough.  It was a dude, but he was very timid and afraid of hurting me when I'd ask for more pressure.  No, Bro, dig the fuck in.  Work out your aggression on my back.  I'll let you know when it's too much.  He didn't once get there.  He was apparently also afraid of being sued because he was overly conservative with the sheet/blanket and if my butt crack even started to peep out, he covered that up.  I finally said, it's fine, we all have butt cracks.  I extended the massage for 30 minutes because he FINALLY started digging it and working out the knots that the other lady had "gotten out."  Uh, no, that's not what you did, Patter McPatterson.

-And in true first worldy things.. Depending on how sore I am after our Snowcation (from snowboarding, you pervs), I may schedule a massage when we get back.  If I don't schedule one when we get back, I'll definitely schedule one after the Charleston half marathon.

-Final grades aren't in yet, but here's the breakdown I anticipate:
German: A (actually, this grade is in)
CS (assembly language): B
Circuits: B
Cybersecurity: B
Online cybersecurity: A

Is that the Dean's List?  IDK.
Gold Star = all A's, but I knew by halfway that wasn't in my future for this semester.

-I was discussing getting all A's with another student (a marine student, which is kinda like day vet, except if they are still active duty they are supposed to wear their uniform), and he is married with kids and he said the difference between his home life and an all A's semester vs his home life and a B's and C's get degrees semester was a LOT less stress.  I agreed.  We talked about how the effort to get A's just doesn't go well with having a family.  I equated his kids to my full time job for this situation.

I also think there's a hurdle you cross at a certain point when you REALLY accept that anything other than failing = getting a degree.  The marine pointed out, "Do you ask your doctor what his graduating GPA was?  No, he's still a doctor if he had a 1.5 GPA or a 4.0."  Preach it brother.  My semester wasn't overly difficult, but I also accepted getting grades other than A's.  After my Calc 2 D(ebacle) and failing my CS (data algorithms) class, I realized that sometimes you're going to struggle and STILL not do well.  So when I minimally struggle and still get passing grades AND enjoy my home life, why not?

-Teh German had an overnight travel this week for work and my solo evening?  I went to the gym after my shitty massage, got KFC for dinner (and didn't receive my sweet tea, fuckers), went by the car wash, went home, ate dinner, checked my computer for work things, then went upstairs and laid in the bathtub for over an hour, finished a book, got my prune-y ass out of the tub, got ready for bed, clicked around on social media, facetimed with Teh German, and then promptly went the fuck to sleep.  It was glorious.

There were things I could have done (put my hooks in my medal rack, work on the immigration interview photo album, empty Roomy, laundry, Cricut projects that have been waiting on me to not have homework, etc), but laziness was the decision.. and I deserved it.  I handled the entire semester without anxiety meds.  #Micdrop

-I get an immense satisfaction from grabbing the EXACT number of hangers I need from the closet to hang the laundry.  I don't count what needs to be hung first, I just grab "enough" hangers.  #MrsBigDeal

-One of Company's new policies for 2018 was a $25 per month gym subsidy.  To receive this, you have to file an expense report, which is the WORST thing about my company.. the time management/expense system.  For real, everyone hates it.  Filing an expense report is painful.  I had to be walked through the process.  I was not the first.  I was annoyed there wasn't direction I could just follow to do it myself.  So.. I created a document with instructions and send it to HR for distribution.  #TechWriterLife

-Dear Best Buy,
Teh Sister and I are not the same person and her purchases on my account don't make sense.  My purchases on her account make sense since I probably gave you her phone number for rewards.  I'll stop that.

-Teh Sister explained that you can turn off auto redeem on Best Buy rewards.  Life changed.

-Me buying shit at Walmart/Sam's with the option to pick up at the store or ship it.
Does this order qualify for free shipping?
How long would I have to wait for pick up?
1 item: several days,
the rest of the order: pick up today.
Is it heavy?
Looks like free shipping is a winner!

-I went from WW2 fiction to women's fiction (love story line, happy ending expected) to two (translated from) German books, a WW2 fiction and a fantasy, and it really is a system shock.  Since the books are translated from German, it's another twist (and sometimes a difficulty).  I really need to stockpile some books for our Snowcation... because yes, I'm a book hoarder, Gentle Readers.  No fucks given.  #ReadingIsLyfe

-I will be purchasing ski goggles this weekend.  I really should have gotten my ski britches hemmed and taken in, but real life was too overwhelming for the last month to make that a priority.

-Oops, I ordered a new Samsung Galaxy Tab A 8" or some ridiculous name for myself.  I have a 7" Kindle Fire, but I HATTEEEE, hate, haaaattteee it.  I love how small it is (for reading) but I hate the lag so much that I rarely use it at all anymore because it makes me so angry.  I used to use my Kindle for puzzles and reading and fun things... but the 7" Fire is soooooo slow, I can't bear to even unlock it, which takes literal seconds.  Also, it doesn't have any way for me (only) to listen to audiobooks since I don't have headphones with a jack, because 2018.

The real reason I ordered it was because I had $75 in Best Buy rewards that had auto redeemed, so I got it for stupid cheap.  It will be here in time for our Snowcation.  YAAAASSSSSS. 

-Since I had some time to burn after my massage before I met Teh German for dinner, I finally took myself to Barnes and Noble to peruse and read.  I've not been in a B&N for years because I use the library now and because I mostly read ebooks or listen to audiobooks.  For real, walking into a B&N smells like coming home.  The smell of books and coffee.  I can't help it, it's such a comfort.  I walked around for a little bit and then asked for help finding ...And Then You Die From Dysentery.  On my way to find a chair, I passed by the social studies books and picked up White Fragility as well. 

I powered through Dysentery in about 7 minutes, max.  Then, I started reading White Fragility which wasn't the least bit awkward as I sat beside a black dude.  The author used high level language, so it really requires a lot of focus to understand what is being said and the obnoxious music that was piping through the store was very distracting.  That said, the book reminds me of my sociology teacher at NC State who pointed out that "flesh colored" band-aids are only flesh colored to SOME people.  She was awesome.  I didn't buy the book, since I wanted to get it from the library.  Turns out, not available from my library(s), which isn't surprising because #SouthCarolina.

The dude and I eventually ended up chatting for a few minutes.  He wore his "Band of Gold" (his class ring from The Citadel) and I asked when he graduated, his major, etc.  Then I had to leave to meet Teh German, but I was glad it wasn't weird.

ZWEI - Money Shit

This was a very weird week, I haven't felt like cooking, and I am an animal so I treat myself with food.  #NotSorry

-Holy City shirt and hoodie and beer
-Bojangles x2
-Teh Running Bestie's bday present (her bday is July)
-A shitty pat-pat massage
-Sparkle skirt that I mentally ordered 6 months ago.
-Coffee (which wasn't good, as I feared)
-Pizza for lunch
-A not shitty massage
-power bill (which is much decreased thanks to the cool temps, praise Allah!)
-new tablet

DREI - From My Phone Shit

Grilled cheese, beeches

If this isn't the most applicable thing I've seen all semester.

I feel like my backpack describes me in all the best ways.
Space, M with unicorns (thanks Erin!), and Yzma.

When your tuna melt game is ON POINT.

The Ranch is back.
*insert all the praise hands emojis*
PS.  I laugh even when there's no laugh track.

When you just give up on studying, because come what may.

Wednesday morning...

Why is my caramel vessel soooo raw?
This was probably the most disgusting apple I've ever eaten.

This is what the dog free life looks like.

Came into work this morning to this.
Looks like someone will not be having a good day.

VIER - From the Internet Shit

I know that Buzzfeed is just click bait, but sometimes it works on me.. and then I extra hate it when they are actually on point about something...

Really, cotton candy and cotton candy cones WITH THE DENTAL HYGIENE?
Good jorb, Sam's Club.

FÜNF - Things that made me happy this week

  1. Having the house to myself for one night, even if it was bittersweet.
  2. Teh German returning from travel.  I didn't have anyone to celebrate the end of the semester with.
  3. Fall 2018 semester COMPLETE.
  4. Best Buy rewards.
  5. The financial ability to get 2 massages in one week.  
  6. SNOWCATION in less than a week.
  7. Rain and cold weather.  IN MY ELEMENT, PEOPLE.
  8. Accomplishing work tasks quickly.
  9. Morgan Harper Nichols insta account.   If she published a book with her drawings, I'd buy a hardcopy.
  10. Knowing that my beasts are well taken care of by their Other Momma (Teh Running Bestie), even if I miss them like crazy.

Happy Friday, Gentle Readers.


  1. I felt/feel that same time warp.

    YES TO THE GRILLED CHEESE!! I had been craving it for days & finally got some on Sunday. I want mooore!

  2. The fact that you are debating the petty bitch situation is why we are kind of the same person :-p Plus I also do the hanger thing. I've only gotten one massage but it was similar where I honestly felt no pressure and no different at the end. Do people not believe women like pressure? Because light touch freaks me out. Totally suffering from Prime-nesia at the moment.


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