Monday, October 3, 2016

Weekend Review {10/3}


Friday morning I woke up in a foul mood.  Thursday night, Teh German and I were having a silence-off.  Much like a stand-off, except with silent contempt for each other.  It was a combination of things that happened that pissed me off throughout the day but came to a head when he got home from work.  To the point that if he didn't ask me what was wrong, I wasn't speaking to him at all, because as he told me during our campfire chat, I always just tell him things anyway and he never has to ask.  /rage.  In fact, I had even went to bed before he did and I didn't recall him even coming to bed at all.

Except, my mood didn't last long.  After the alarms went off, I ticked off my reasons of still being pissed (completely reasonable, right?) and continued my silent treatment.  Teh German rolled over and snuggled me some, but still I wasn't speaking to him.  I'd show him who was more stubborn.  Then he apologized for being a douche the night before.  My anger melted away, thankfully.  It's exhausting being pissed off and stubborn.

We got up, got ready, and headed to work.  During the day, Teh German went to the Verizon place and transferred his phone line to his company's phone plan, which saves us dollars.  After I found out that several of his coworkers had cell phones that the company paid for a few weeks ago, I asked Teh German why he wasn't on that train?  AKA Megan said get off my plan you data hog and let your company pay for your cell phone and save us some dollas.  What this really means is that there will be no more data diets for me!  YAY!  Also, it's a little sad to not see him on our plan, but we're saving over $60 and he is sharing 24GB with his coworkers.  I told him that he needs to go ahead and tell his coworkers that at least 4GB of that is his. 

I left work after lunch to head to Mount Pleasant to pick up my race packet for a race I wasn't running on Saturday.  I'd already paid and I wanted to see what the shirt looked like.  It was a waste of gas, other than the part where I stopped at Metto on the way home.  Instead of delivering Teh German's beverage to him at work, I saved myself 10 minutes and headed home to get started on packing and putting away the laundry that I'd washed that morning.

Roux-dog came over with his Humom when they got home at 2 so that way Roux and Meri could burn some energy.  When Teh German arrived home, they left, we finished packing, and we were out the door around 3ish.

Stupid outside chair peed rust water down my leg and I was PISSEEEEDDD.

We were headed to Home, Home to attend Teh Sister and Teh BIL's going away party.  We no longer have a stopping place in Fayettenam, yay/boo, since Teh BIL is PCSing to CA for a while.  While we were driving, I made conversation about the proposal situation.  Something that I hadn't been able to not think about all week.  Still, not much from Teh German about it, who just sat there listening to me babble.  Things were ok between us, but not super good since we definitely weren't in sync.

We arrived at Teh Dad's around 7:45, right on time.  We immediately sat down to dinner.  After dinner we all migrated up to the fire pit and hung out till around midnight making potty jokes (literally, since one of the neighbor's has a toilet in the part of her yard that connects to Teh Dad's property that she refuses to get rid of).

After many, many marshmallows and several good ideas for placing a skeleton at the toilet with a sign that said, "Can I use your toilet? -not Teh Dad", we headed up to bed, exhausted.  Of course, my brain decides that when it's dark and bedtime is when to make conversation so I prodded Teh German some more about what was going on and he said he was feeling overwhelmed.  When I asked what he was overwhelmed by, I never got an answer because he fell asleep.  I tried not to be angry, because it had been a long day and he had driven us to Home, Home, but I was still irritated because I really wanted to discover whatever underlying issue was causing all this.  Eventually, I fell asleep.


All night long it was like I was thinking about Trump/Clinton.  I wish I was kidding.  I'd say I was dreaming, but it was more like lucid sleeping where you are aware of what is happening.  I was exhausted, but I knew I was forgetting something.  I had to think back to the night before, dinner, the first, marshmallows, oh yeah, I was pissed off at Teh German because he'd fallen asleep while I was trying to have a heart-to-heart with him.  Then I was pissed off that I was pissed off.  Why couldn't I have just let it go?  Whhhyyy?  So then, I made it my mission to talk to him that morning.  I had plenty of time to think about it since I didn't want to wake him up at 0811, when I had woken up, to talk about things.  I knew that'd go over like a lead balloon.  I read my Kindle, I did a puzzle, I checked FB, and finally, someone made a noise that I knew had to have roused him enough for him to hear me say, "You never told me what was overwhelming you last night."  I could feel him instantly tense up, because of course, he'd been hoping I'd let it go/not bring it up first thing.  But..well, I'm me and letting things go just isn't my style.

He said he didn't know and I finally said that his being "overwhelmed" sounded like me being "tired."  Those words were cop-outs for having reasons we didn't want to discuss.  AKA, he didn't want to talk about his feelings.  At this point, things started to click into place for me.  After calling him out on using cop-outs and a lot of "I don't know's" I started to understand things.  I'm paraphrasing here but it went like this:

Teh German: Yeah, I don't like to talk about feelings.
Teh Megan: Yeah well, me either and I've been doing it all week and it's been awkward and hard and embarrassing because I'm not the girl that begs for an engagement ring, much less talks about it.  We haven't talked about it for the entire time we've been together, other than in passing, usually when someone else brings it up.  So me pretty much telling you I want you to propose?  Yeah, that's not me.  So I've had to talk about my feelings about to YOU, which is completely embarrassing, but I've done it, multiple times.  I'm still talking about it and it's just as frustrating and awkward as it was a week ago.
tG: I still don't like to talk about feelings.
tM: You think I do?  No, I feel like I've been babbling all week, on and on and it's not something I like doing, but we're not "right" right now, and talking about it is the only thing that is going to fix it.
tG: I just wouldn't want to get engaged with things like they are right now.
tM: Well, we have to talk about things to fix them.
tG: I don't like to talk about things.
tM: Well maybe you need to practice.  I can't be your person if you don't talk to me.  Honestly, now that I've talked about it for an entire week and I feel like I haven't stopped thinking about it, I don't want you to propose to me.  I want you to talk to me.  I guess I was using you proposing as a substitute for you talking to me and feeling close to you.

It was like instant relief flooded through both of us.  The pressure was off of him, and I'd finally figured out what my problem was, his emotional constipation.  That said, it took what felt like a week of never-ending consideration and a seriously ugly, snotty cry.  While he said he'd try to be better about the feelings chat, I know that it is a conversation we will have again, because we've had it before.

I get it, it's not manly to have feelings, but I don't need his manliness proven to me.

Our conversation wrapped up right in time, because Teh WJL was on her way down the mountain to visit!  I attempted to not get snot absolutely every where (after realizing I'd already left a huge tear/snot spot (ha! that rhymes) on Teh German's shirt) and got up and showered and got ready.  Right as I was finishing up, someone yelled down the stairs that Teh WJL was here.  She was able to greet everyone else but she saved the best for last: me, duh.

We chatted and fetched her Lularoe stuff from her car and I went through it and put on a fashion/strip show on our back porch for everyone to see (truthfully, the neighbors can't see onto the back porch).  I ended up with several cute items, much to the dismay of my bank account.  Also, there was the outfit I tried on as a joke, since stripes and polka dots don't go together, and we were all stunned that it actually worked!  Ok, without the socks it was way better.

After my show, Teh WJL, Teh German, and I headed to Loe's Brewery to have lunch.  The food was actually really good and so was the beer, per Teh German.  He was disappointed that their growler system was down because he had considered bringing some back to Teh Dad's for the party later that night.  Boo.  Instead we stopped by the grocery store on our way home and he made due.

After lunch, we were headed to Goodwill to drop off some items and maybe peruse and I made a detour into downtown because I wanted to see what had changed.  As I drove through, we started noticing a whole bunch of classic cars and I noticed a parking spot, so I pulled in and we walked by the old cars and in and out of several antique shops and an art gallery.  Teh WJL found a painting she loved and we bought it for her as a surprise.  Actually, I sent Teh German back inside to pick it up while Teh WJL and I checked out the ice cream store.  We walked out empty handed because we were still full, but it was an effective diversion.  We ended up in an antique store where I found windows that we will probably put over the entry bench and pyrex bowls, which are perfect since I needed some larger bowls.

Grumpy and Dopey


Teh WJL: Ooo a dragon.
Teh Megan: Wait, watch this.  Hey babe, come look!

This made my brain wrinkle.

Classic and creepy..

Repurposed old buildings have all the charm.

I found a Beyonce.

Then I found another one.

Teh WJL: MEG! Come look!  I'm tribal!

Yurtle is as cool as all the hot rods.
As if you needed me to tell you that.

We decided finally that we were through walking around, and the car show was supposed to start at 4, and we'd already walked around the cars enough.  We headed towards home, making a pit stop at the grocery store for Teh German and the liquor/ABC store for me.  Once we were equipped with adult beverages, we headed back to Teh Dad's to wait on the gathering to commence.

Around 6, people started showing up.  I encouraged Teh Dad to get the fire going because Teh Sister's hanger was starting to seep out and Teh German went and helped him.  We had roasted hot dogs, pasta salad, and chips for dinner.  We had smores for dessert.  We also played a knock off version of "Watch Ya Mouth" since we couldn't find the game for sale anywhere.  Teh Sister bought cheek retractors and we read out Cards Against Humanity cards.  The only problem with this was that we actually had some of the cards memorized, which made it easier.  I/we should have looked up the sayings from the game and wrote them on slips of paper.  That might have made it more fun since the things we would say would be more difficult to understand.  Also, Teh Sister got medium sized mouth guards.  The bigger they are, the harder they are to speak with.  Lesson learned.  Nonetheless, we had some solid giggles.

After 2 rounds (of 10+ people), we stopped playing and socialized more as people left.  Eventually, we called it a night around 10:45.  Teh Dad has this ridiculous thing where he has to burn a certain quota of wood, which always seem to take at least 1-2 hours longer than I want to be up for so I said I was going to bed.  It's not like I have to be at the fire for it to burn down, but I do try to be social so I don't seem like an asshole.  It's obviously not effective if I'm up past my bedtime bitching about how tired I am.

Teh WJL had left while we were playing the game, because she's a chicken (as was everyone who didn't play).  Teh German and I headed inside to get ready for bed and we crashed hard.  I was struggling to stay asleep and opened the window around 12:15.  One of my best life choices of the weekend.


We got a slow start on Sunday morning.  Originally, I had said I wanted to leave by 10.  I knew that if I said 10, we might be on the road by 11, but probably not.  I knew, for certain, that I wanted to be home by doggy dinner time, which is 5:30-7.  Teh German and I laid in bed chatting for a bit and we took our time getting ready.  We got the car loaded with the grill that Teh Sister had donated to our cause and more boxes (this time with children's books) from Teh Dad.  At which point, we are informed that maybe we could go to breakfast at a greasy spoon nearby after Teh Sister and BIL finish their packing.  I said it depends on how long they will be packing and they weren't close to done, so we said, no thanks and headed out.  I also know that to eat at that place would definitely upset my stomach and that's not a good way to spend a 4.5 hour road trip.

We stopped at Bojangles for lunch since we hadn't eaten.  2 things of note.  1- they have pink icing on the Boberry biscuits and pink straws right now for Breast Cancer Awareness month.  2- My RBF is on high.  As I was pondering outloud to Teh German about why everything was pink and suggesting maybe because breast cancer awareness month, a guy in the booth behind us turns around and says, "I know why the icing is pink."  I turned around with a look on my face that must have read, "I will fucking kill you."  The guy said, "I'm sorry, did I offend you?"  I quickly realized that the guy wasn't being malicious, but was probably autistic.  He confirmed that it was because of booby cancer month and I said thanks and got to eating.  I had noticed him when he had walked by to sit down but I didn't think anything of it.  We listened to him talk to himself for most of our meal.  He wasn't bothering anyone and I think his mom/caretaker was an employee, so she was cleaning the dining room and she'd walk by and check on him.  He was eating a meal and not bothering anyone, so it was fine.  But really, my face.  I'm such an asshole.

After noms, we got on the road and headed home.  An uneventful drive, we made it home by 4:30.  Roux and his Humom came over to get some exercise in before they departed on their road trip Monday morning.  Teh German and I unloaded the car and then Teh German set about cleaning the grill and putting it back together while I watered the flowers and spoiled my pups and pittered around the house.

My flowers are bringing me such great joy since they are blooming!

New grill!

Eventually, I started dinner (frozen pizza because we're fancy) and it was time to eat.  We paused to eat and then resumed activities.  Teh German was working on the grill and trying to get the shelf to stand like it should and I was checking FB.  Eventually, I came inside and started getting through emails from the weekend.  I had suggested we watch HIMYM, except that Netflix was being a douche and was giving us a network error.  I tried to troubleshoot, but nothing worked, so I gave up and went back to the internet, while Teh German watched snowboard videos.

He had informed me there was a movie premiering at 9 that he wanted to watch and he was getting frustrated that he couldn't get it to work on the downstairs TV, so I suggested he watch it upstairs.  Pretty much, I'm a genius.  He was able to get the Red Bull channel loaded and watch his video, while I finished up on the computer downstairs, and then headed upstairs to get ready for bed and laid in bed finishing up The Husband's Secret.

Once his movie was over, he got ready for bed and joined me.  I was 94% done with the book and I was going to finish it, but then decided that since I'd already gotten through the twists, I could finish it Monday.  It worked out just fine.  I didn't miss anything.

Overall, another excellent weekend in the books.  We made it Home, Home and back without incident.  It was even another gathering where Teh Mom and Teh Dad and Teh Stepmom (and Teh Granny) were all in the same place, at the same time and the world didn't implode.  CRAZY.

I get to spent Monday working from home since the internet company is sending someone to setup TV access for us since it's included in our HOA agreement that we get basic cable for free-izzle.  It's only 12 channels and one of those is the roller channel (or for normal people a powerpoint presentation of ads/community announcements to the soundtrack of pop music/a radio station).  The tech thought I was pretty weird when I stopped on the roller channel and left it there.  Obviously, he never lived in GTMO and had to appreciate the roller channel.

Speaking of GTMO....
There's a hurricane that is about to tear through Haiti/Dominican Republic/Bahamas/Cuba.  It's currently set to hit .  As if the earthquakes in 2010 didn't do enough to tear Haiti up, this will probably undo everything that has been fixed since.  GTMO evacuated all dependents to Florida, so this is serious.  Keep all those people who are going to be affected by this storm in your thoughts as they get absolutely pummeled.  Also, a special shout out to America's best as they literally weather the storm and keep their posts manned because terrorists are still terrorists, even when you have to swim to work.


  1. All boys are emotionally constipated I think. It is just in their nature. And ummm I want roasted marshmallows so hard right now that I literally can't focus on anything else. You suck.

  2. oh man.. learning how to properly communicate when you have different styles and ways of dealing with things can be SO hard. i feel your pain. i used to do the silent treatment and hold grudges, but i realised, like you said, it was exhausting, and just made me super unhappy. KC is pretty much the same with being emotionally constipated, i was never good at articulating my thoughts and feelings but i've had to get better because otherwise KC would never say anything and i'd be mad all the time. i kept expecting and wanting him to act like me, and he didn't, obviously. you'll get there, it sucks right now, but we had those kinds of fights/discussions as well, and having them is how you overcome them and learn how to deal with other things.. like we had a lot of communication issues about big things (getting engaged/married/green card, moving out, buying a house, etc etc) so that now, the little-medium things are so easy to deal with, and we can tackle the bigger things better as well.


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