Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Confessions {6/10}

-Do you still "rewind" DVDs or whatever you're streaming? I mean, I know the term came from antiquated technology when the entertainment system was based on reels of tape that had to be physically unwound after they were played, but that isn't necessarily true now. #bekindrewind

-Mr. Scrooge walked in the bedroom the other night and I just so happened to be scratching my junk because I had an itch and he was like, "Why would you let me see that?" Seriously? I responded with, "Dudes are constantly scratching their shit all the damn time! YOU are always scratching yourself and I have to see you, so what's the difference?" Him, "We have stuff that needs adjusted, your stuff is all inside." Me, "Right and I have little hairs that poke my junk all the day long and it sometimes itches and I'm going to scratch it." #doublestandard #scratchingisorgasmic

-When I was stationed in Bahrain, I bought this sappy Edward Monkton book and I read one page every day to Teh Bear when we skyped. It was probably one of the most torturous, cheesiest things I've ever done. I tell you this because I miss cheesy and sappy. #whereisthelove

-When I eat corn on the cob, I don't cross into another row as I eat across. If I do, I have to fix it by munching on my corn like a yard critter. #thisisOCD

This little turd is eating it WRONG (Source)

-Multi-tasking like a boss: downloaded the Kindle app on my work computer to be able to entertain myself during meetings all the while looking "busy." #itsforthebookclub

-A few weeks ago I bitched confessed about how Mr. Scrooge never puts anything in the same place. What prompted that rant was the fact that I stubbed my toe EXTREMELY hard on his boots that were at the end of the table (literally right beside the walkway to the backdoor, but "out of the way" per his standards because putting his shoes in the closet (where I put mine) is too difficult) and I was about 85% sure then that I broke my toe. Well, that was a few weeks ago. Almost every time I've run since then my stubbed toe has hurt. After giving it a comparison pat down with my other (uninjured) toe, I'm pretty sure it really is broken and I have no idea what to do about it. #nomegusta #putyourshitaway #broketoessuck

-Some search results how people have found Teh Blog in the last month:
chocolate museum orlando
south carolina drivers licence 2015
vrgjs fewm (ya know what, I'll take what I can get)
#25 humpday
aviation cruise vx1 july 20 - august 14, 2015 (some fool doesn't know about OPSEC)
crest whitening expressions orange
disney belle huh
faded southern belle (2nd favorite)
girl anus pooping (no me gusta)
www.canide keek in
eidws board questions (apologies to these people, but if you don't get it from your book you're studying the wrong things)
2015 crackerjack photography at greyhounds in gettysburg blur of fur
eidws is a joke (my personal favorite)

-I ordered the set of 3 maxi skirts from Groupon because I was tired of waiting on them to come back on Woot.  Totally worth it.  I got khaki, grey, and black.  I actually already have a black maxi skirt I got from Amazon, but I'm not a huge fan because it stretches really bad and by the end of the day I end up tripping all over it.  But truly, it's too hot in SC to not wear maxi skirts... and these are the long skirts so shaving my legs is optional.  #didIshaveforthis #theanswerisalwaysNO

#bathroomselfie #noshame

-I signed up with Blogging for Books and I'm kinda excited about it.  My first book is Five Years in Heaven and I hope it's very similar to Tuesdays with Morrie.  #willblogforfreebooks

-The downstairs hallway at work almost always smells like poop.  I would assume because the ventilation goes straight through the men's bathroom.  Not sure who thought that was a good idea.  #moarairfreshener

-I'm strongly considering buying a pass for 12 yoga classes on base.  Maybe I should try out one class before bite that bullet...  The problem is classes are Thursdays at 6:30-7:30PM.  That's pretty much my dinner time and almost my bedtime.  What this means is that I have to drag my ass out of my house after 6pm, which means that when I go home from work I can't immediately change into pajamas...  #thestruggleisreal

-Why did front closing bras practically disappear?  I just don't understand the practicality of back closing bras... because they AREN'T practical at all!  Is it male designers?  Is it male laziness in taking off the bra?  I just don't see women making this decision.  #Iblamemen

-Bra Logic:  #boobies
1.  Make it close in the back!  It's better because then it's totally inconvenient to close and no one can figure out eye hooks, so definitely add those because they are so complicated to get aligned when you can't see what you're doing...
2.  Make them expensive even though most women in the world don't even like wearing bras but because it's convention now, they will.  Extra rows of eye hooks for those with big boobs definitely will cost more, even though we only paid a fraction of a cent to add the hooks and there's no more material there than on the smaller sizes.
3.  Make them as uncomfortable as possible.  With wires and straps and plastic-y bits that dig into uncomfortable places.
4.  Those with big boobs do not deserve to have pretty bras in fun prints.  Nope, nope, nope.  Just white and nude for them.. and black if we're feeling generous.  We're also gonna add some padding in because women should get their monies worth.
5.  Finally, all bras should be sexy, because boobs are for sex not for feeding offspring.

-I do this annoying thing if I'm not fed with a promptness where I constantly announce my hungry status to anyone around me.  This is most inconvenient in meetings when I'm trying to listen and the only thing I hear (and have to stop myself from saying outloud, which doesn't always happen) on repeat is "I'm so hungry.  I'm so hungry.  I'm so hungryyyy."  I also make this declaration at restaurants when I'm really hungry and our food hasn't arrived with a quickness.  It has been known to make food show up faster.  #hungrytohangrywithaquickness

Linking up with:

Life with Lolo

Because Shanna Said So...

Hodges Podge


  1. LOL about eating corn on the cob. I totally eat it the same way which is totally the correct way of eating it!

  2. You're the second person to mention this Blogging for Books thing...going to have to Google this.

  3. I am OCD when eating basically anything. My plate has to be a certain way, I try not to let things touch, I eat methodically and yes, the corn on the cob must be evenly finished areas at all times. My husband doesn't know how to put anything away. ALL THE RAGE. Hahah!

  4. I just went thru the struggle of buying new bras. Came home guessed it! Black, white & tan. Not even any lace!

  5. So...the bra and boobies caught me at a bad time, and I need to vent. I spent $60 on a bra that actually closed in the front from Soma. The second time I wore it, the metal piece that closed in the front broke. The metal broke. It didn't come unstitched, the metal actually snapped so there were rough edges. Oh yeah, and I bought it when I was in the States, but I'm now back in Australia, and now I have a new broken bra. Boo!

  6. YES about the not putting shit where it actually belongs. About six months ago my son and I were chasing each other down our hallway and as I was running I stubbed my toe on one of John's 40 lb weights. I wanted to scream profanities, but surprisingly all I said was "wow, that hurt" quietly and went and sat down ha ha. Also, I seriously struggle with the back clasps on my bras. Like, it takes me a while to get the damn thing ha ha!

  7. I am with you on the hungry thing. It drives my husband crazy but it's like FEED ME DAMMIT. The bra struggle just sucks. No cute bras for big boobies. Also Nursing bras are a fucking joke to anyone that started with a Triple D and then due to housing buckets of milk turn into watermelons. No bras for you! Just be a free swinging milk cow! #endrant


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